Seeing Red
by ThePurple15
Summary: AU. This is what had happened at Lictchfield, before Piper showed up. Red was Galina. And Galina was in love with Lucy. Lucy use to work for the Reznikovs and manages to get herself thrown into prison a year after Galina. Both of them knew each other out of prison, but how will they like each other in? Soft M- reviews are love
1. Chapter 1

*Disclaimer *I do not own Orange is the New Black…Unfortunately. If I did Red would have a larger part than she already does, which may or may not be a good thing. I own my OC and the ideas to the AU part of the story.

The first chapter is more or less introducing the character's relationship. The true story starts in the second chapter.

**Chapter 1**

"Galina, fuck them," she says, hitting the dough with the rolling pin, "they're a bunch of stupid girls, who think they are still in high school. Fuck them." Galina laughs at her young friend words, her blue eyes sparking; however, this time, it was not because of the unshed tears. Lucy was barely out of high school herself, when they hired her, yet here she is scolding women at least thirty years her senior.

"You know I would not be even trying, if it wasn't for my husband trying to get higher…" Galina trails off, pulling the pin from Lucy and working on the dough herself, causing the younger girl to pout and cross her across her bust.

"I don't know why you're still with him," Lucy walks over to the mirror above the stove, to readjust her messy ponytail. Quickly she pulls the band out of her hair, letting the long natural dark brown curls fall down her shoulders and to the middle of her back. Lucy was a small girl, just over five feet tall. When she was in school, the nickname pixie seemed to follow her everywhere. Her green eyes are large, while her nose is small and with faded freckles. Everything about her was pixie like, except her bust, which she hid in large tee shirts. She shakes her hair out, before pulling it back up, this time into a bun on the top of her head. Lucy smirks as she catches Galina watching her through the mirror.

She did not want it to happen, but it did. Lucy has always had a soft spot for the female gender; however, she would never call herself bi. She likes guys too much, but something about the older woman made her smile. Her soft, yet strong hands, tended to make many guest appearance in her late night fantasies. As well as her smooth red hair, which made Lucy wonder if it was as soft as it looked. And she always has had a thing for a heavy accent.

However, she knew, Galina would never leave her husband, even if he did treat her like an accessory than a wife. Therefore, Lucy kept her mouth shut about her feelings, but it did not stop them from fading. Every so often, she would catch Galina looking at her, a blush tinting her pale skin. Lucy craved nothing more, than to know what the woman was thinking during those moments.

"I love him, Luce," Galina finally replies, turning away from the young girl's eyes, with the blush making itself present, "I know he has changed, but he is still the same person I fell in love with in Russia. The same person, who fathered my children. The same one .who brought me to America. The same one, who hired you."

A week past and neither of the women brought up the past conversation. It hurt Lucy, more than it should have. Today, she did not have work. She actually believed she was going to be fired. Galina had been hanging out with the blonde bitches more and more, while her husband entertained the husbands. Lucy, didn't want to think about it, but she didn't trust the Reznikov's new friends. She didn't want to think about her suspensions. She didn't want to believe that Galina had befriended the Russian mob.

Lucy enters the shop, wearing a dress today. It's short. Not quite mini, but defiantly short. It is a soft blue color, similar to her older friend's eyes, with a black ribbon that ties in the back. She sits down at one of the empty tables, and begins to pick at her fingers, waiting for someone to notice a customer has entered.

The doorbell chimes behind her, causing her to see Galina enter with a smile on her face. It warms Lucy's heart for a second before she catches what is on her older friend's feet.

"New shoes?" Lucy asks, bringing the older woman's attention to her.

"Yes," Galina replies happily, "Natasha has the same pair."

"They are defiantly a lovely shade of Pepto Bismol," Lucy shakes her head, in pity. Galina should not force herself in this, trying to fit in with these awful women. Galina is better than they are, if only she could see it.

"New dress?" Galina now questions, sitting next to her young friend, causing Lucy to blush. Galina feels her heart stop for a second. Her young friend is beautiful, even a blind man can see that.

"No, actually," Lucy says, hiding her blush with her hand, placing it upon her cheek as she looks to the floor, "Just felt like dressing up." Just trying to impress you, she doesn't say.

"Well you look nice," Dmitri, Galina's husband comes in, interjecting his way into the girl's conversation. Lucy did not like the man. She knew she was hired purely because of how she looked and not that she could cook, because before befriending Galina, she could not cook to save her life. Dmitri would also check out other women. It hurt Lucy, believing Galina didn't see it.

"Thank you, Mr. Reznikov."

"Lucy, I've told you before that you can call me Dmitri," he says, with a smile, causing Lucy to want to hit him.

"Right," she remarks, not going to happen.

Another week passes and Lucy remains silent. Not just with her feeling but her knowledge as well. The Reznikov's now worked for the mob. For Galina, Lucy would remain silent.

It's late and it's raining, and Lucy knows she should close up, but she can't. The blonde bitches have been horrible to Galina. Lucy just had to make sure everything was okay. So she started keeping the shop open late, entertaining Dmitri and his Mob friends, waiting for Galina to return.

However, the men were not there tonight. And Lucy cleans the counter. The doorbell chimes and Galina finally walks in. She was not expecting Lucy to still be here, so quickly she wipes away her tears and smiles.

"Privet, prekrasnaya," Galina says, breaking Lucy's concentration on the counter. Quickly, the young girl raises her head to see she friend. Her stomach drops. Though the tears were gone, Galina's face was still red and puffy. Lucy knows she has to do something.

With confidence, she walks towards the older redheaded woman and takes her hand, "Come on, let's go upstairs. I can give you a makeover."

Galina chuckles at the young girl's antics, but tails along nonetheless. They make their way to the Reznikov's apartment upstairs and into Galina and Dmitri's room. Lucy sits Galina at her desk vanity and turns her to the side to face each other.

Lucy pulls out the foundation and begins. It covers up the red, but does nothing for the puffiness that will go down in time. She then adds a light pink blush to the sides of Galina's face. Cautiously Lucy places her hand under Galina's cheek and wipes away some of the extra powder. Her face was just as soft as Lucy imagined. Galina naturally blushes, under the young girl's fingers.

"You know," Lucy starts, attempting to break the tension, as she pulls out the blue eye shadow, "I use to be a dancer."

Galina lifts a perfectly trimmed eyebrow at the younger girl, causing her to giggle this time, "Not like that, I was a ballerina."

That does nothing to relieve the tension simmering between the two, but she continues anyways, "And they use to make us do our makeup in the strangest way. Up close, I swore all of us looked like clowns. However, there was this one eye thing that I always thought looked pretty. I use to call it a fish tail."

After she says this, she pulls out the liquid eyeliner and makes two wings extending from the corner of Galina's eyes.

"They would also make us wear the brightest red lipstick. Though it always seemed to make me look funny, I think it would complement your complexion and hair color," Lucy says, attempting to sound like she knows what she is doing. She places a hand once more under Galina's chin as the older woman parts her lips. Slowly, she covers the woman's thin lips with the brightest red lipstick she could find. It would be so easy to kiss her now, Lucy thinks. Her face heats up as well as the pit of her stomach. Lucy raises her eyes for a second to see Galina watching the younger girl's lips as well. It would be so easy to kiss her now. Lucy leans in just a little bit more as she traces Galina's bottom lip with the red. Lucy can feel Galina's hot breath upon her check. Both of their chests seem to rise in fall in a faster beat. She finishes the lip, but does not move just yet. She looks up once more to the older woman's blue eyes, to see they have become darker, almost indigo. Both heartbeats pick up in speed. It would be so easy to kiss her now.

They hear the doorbell chime downstairs. Quickly, Lucy moves from her leaning spot in front the woman who makes brave in more ways than one and straightens herself out. The spell between the two seems to stay hooked.

"I should go," Lucy says against her true desires. Galina nods her head in agreement. Hastily, Lucy makes her way out of the room and down the stairs back into the kitchen. Her heart beat seems to have slowed down, but her mind stays in the gutter of what was about to happen, if she stayed a second longer.

After grabbing her bag, she walks out of the kitchen, to see the Dmitri and the men of the Russian mob.

Lucy carefully makes her way to the door, but is stops, as one of the mob men call out to her- "Is our American Doll leaving so soon?"

She turns around quickly to see it was the bald scary one, who has dubbed her with a new nickname. Lucy is frozen on the spot.

"Doll, don't leave," he continues, "We have some business to discuss with you."

Lucy remains in her spot.

"Galina has spoken much about you and I can see why. You are very beautiful and I hear you are a very good worker. Now before you refuse, I must tell you, we have been watching you. I know you like her. No, she does not know yet. You do not want to ruin your friendship. Falling for a married woman, we know that was not your plan. However, if you join us, well we can make life very easy for you. If not, well, im sure Galina will have to find a new friend. I will leave you to interpret that."

Lucy stays with the men that night.

Its is two weeks this time and Lucy remains silent to Galina for more than two reasons now. The tension of that night, seemed to fade for the older woman, but for Lucy, it hurt inside to pretend nothing has happened. She convinced herself that nothing was going to happen. It was all in her head. It would not be the first time she read someone or a situation wrong.

Galina seemed to be hanging out with the men of the mob more and more. Luckily, they kept up their end of the deal. They wanted to become bigger. That is what they told Galina. She had the idea to put their produce in a place that would never close, like a hospital or school. They went with a woman's prison. Lucy, in a way, became a delivery girl, for the mob. When Galina was cooking, Lucy would go to the storage room and repack the boxes that would be sent to the prison.

It was another rainy night, this time; however, Lucy decides to close early. She walks from the back room and into the kitchen, to grab her bag, when she hears a sob. Her heart breaks at the sound. She looks around and she finds Galina sitting at an empty table in the corner, with her hands covering her face. Quickly, Lucy makes her way to her friend, and runs her hand down the older woman's back.

"Shhh, Galina," Lucy says, trying to sound calming, "It's alright…It's alright. Tell me, what is wrong?"

Galina lifts her head, only to lean back on the young girl's stomach behind her. She holds on to the girl's baggy shirt for dear life, not wanting her to leave.

"Come on, Galina," Lucy is more than worried now, she has never seen the older woman this upset, "Tell Lucy what is wrong."

"Moy angel," Galina whimpers, "Moy angel, I've done something bad."

"Galina?"

"I'm going to jail, lyubov'"

**Privet, prekrasnaya- hello, lovely**

**moy angel- my angel**

**lyuboy'- love**

"


	2. Chapter 2

*disclaimer…don't own…bladda bladda blah…* Anyways, I wanted all of the girls to already be in jail, except Piper…so yeah. AU story, remember?

**Chapter 2**

"Hi, I'm Lorna Morello," the driver flips her short black hair as she turns towards Lucy. It has been a year since Galina gave her the fateful news that tore their friendship apart. Lucy was angry. The mob did not keep their side of the deal. She had pushed Galina away from her and cursed up a storm. Never had Lucy been so angry, so furious. Nor had Galina ever seen the pixie like girl in such a state. She tried to calm her young friend down, but it is hard to calm someone down, while that person is contemplating murder. Lucy blamed the mob and the bald man. She finally told Galina one of her secrets- that Lucy had been helping the mob. And then it was Galina's turn to be angry. Their friendship had ended. Lucy did not visit Galina in jail. And Galina didn't ask for her to.

"Congratulations," Lucy replies, looking out the window. It was a rainy day, which seemed to cause the whole prison to smell like a wet dog.

"And what's your name?" the woman wore bright red lipstick and had some Jersey or Brooklyn accent- she reminded Lucy of the Pink Ladies from Grease.

"Lucy…McCoy." It is silent after that. Morello does not seem to bother to introduce herself to the other girl in the bus. A Hispanic girl with her hair chopped in a boyish cut and spiked to the top, sits beside Lucy. Tattoos run up and down all visible skin. With the two polar opposite inmates in the car, Lucy did not know what to think of the rest of her future jailbird peers.

They get out of the van and Morello walks them inside. She talks about the prison, but Lucy does not listen. She watches the other criminals around her, categorizing them. They all seemed to stay in cliques of race. As they walk pass the stairs, a heavier woman with minimal tattoos and short haircut, shaved on the side whistles at Lucy. She turns around abruptly, raising her left eyebrow.

The woman winks at her, "hey, doll face! If you ever get lonely, come, and find me."

Lucy smiles, before showing the larger woman her middle finger. She feels hands grasp her shoulders, turning her around. She looks up to see a guard with white and grey hair, with a pig like face.

"Ignore the women, here, inmate," he says, "and you may actually survive." Lucy nods her head, before catching up to Morello and the other girl. They walk just a little bit longer, before stopping in front of a room with multiple bunk beds.

"Here you are Lucy," Morello says with a smile, "You stay here until you are assigned to your own cube. And here is a toothbrush and toothpaste, a gift."

"Thanks you," Lucy says, before making her way in the room. She looks at the bunks, unsure of where to go.

"Here," a girl with puffy dirty blonde hair and too much eyeliner on the bottom of her lids, points to the bunk below her, "You sleep under me."

Lucy walks over to the bottom bunk, ignoring the innuendo. She places her gift on the table beside her, before pulling down the sheets and blanket. Once the bed has been made she sits upon it and is quickly joined but the girl with puffy hair.

"I'm Nicky," she says sticking out her hand; however, Lucy does not take it.

"Nicky, she isn't interested," a bald older woman calls from the bottom bunk across the room. The woman runs her hand across her head, before closing her eyes.

"Cancer," Lucy calls out to the woman, "I can speak for myself."

"Don't be rude," she replies not opening her eyes.

"You're right, I apologize," Lucy says, before turning to Nicky, "I'm Lucy."

"It's alright. First day at a prison puts everyone on edge," Nicky says with a smile.

"The apology was for Cancer," Lucy replies, causing the bald woman to chuckle.

"Well, what are you in here for?" Nicky says, not wanting any awkward tension. Lucy looks at up at the top bunk for a second, wondering how to phrase her words.

"Mafia," is all she says however.

"Oh, that's cool as fuck," Nicky replies, "Myself, drugs. But I have a good friend in here, mafia as well. You two might have something to complain about together. Red can be kind of a hard ass though. She runs the kitchen here."

An alarm goes off, filling the prison.

"Speaking of the kitchen," Nicky says standing up, "It's lunch time now. You can sit with me… if ya want?"

Lucy smirks, before standing up and following the puffy haired girl out of the room. They walk to what looks like a high school cafeteria, but with bored prison guards watching instead of bored teachers.

Nicky brings Lucy to the lunch line, "Morello, the girl who drove you here, will sit with us as well. And so will the nun Ingalls… don't worry she won't try to you know, convert ya. She holds a good conversation. Probably Boo will sit with us as well. If ya sit next to me, she won't come on to ya. Also our hippie friend, yoga Jones. If we are lucky, Red will come out of the kitchen to say hi. She usually bring us extra yogurt…"

Nicky and Lucy make their way closer to the front. Suddenly Lucy's heart stops; by the entrance to the kitchen stands a girl just a few years older than Lucy, with short mousey brown hair, talking to a woman, with a small chef's hat and short bloody red hair. The redheaded woman's bright red lips stay in a smirk as her eyes scan the cafeteria.

"Hey, Luce, food" Lucy hears, breaking her trance. She turns to one of the kitchen staff in front of her, who is attempting to hand her a tray. Lucy reaches for the tray; however, before she grabs it, she sneaks one more peek at the chef, who now seems to have her blue eyes glued on Lucy. The young girl refuses the tray and walks out of line. She ignores the questioning stares as she makes her way to the doors leading out of the cafeteria.

"Inmate, where are you going?" a large blonde guard stops her.

"I'm not hungry," Lucy says wanting to leave, but not willing to leave if it means getting into trouble on her first day.

"Well it's mandatory that inmates eat something for the three meal times every day. So why don't you go sit with those nice white ladies," he says, pointing over to Nicky and her friends, "and I'll get you a tray of food."

Lucy nods her head and walks towards the white table. She sits by Nicky who gives her a questioning look. The blonde guard comes over and places a tray in front of her.

"Hey, Lucy, what was that all about?" Nicky asks in concern, nudging the young girl's shoulder.

"I'm just not hungry," Lucy replies, staring down at the food.

"Is your stomach hurting, sweetie?" Morello asks, "I'm sure Red would get you some crackers and ginger ale if that's the case."

"No," Lucy says too quickly, "I am fine, just not hungry."

"Well you should eat something, doll face," the larger girl who catcalled her earlier today sits down at the table, "Don't want my new girl to be losing her girlish figure."

"Boo, lay off on the girl," an older woman with fading red hair and a cross necklace speaks up. Lucy mouths 'thank you' to her, with a smile. Nicky stands up then, taking Lucy's arm, pulling her up with her.

"Come on, Luce," she says, pulling her towards the kitchen, which is no longer guarded by the redheaded woman, "let's get you some crackers."

Lucy cannot just say no. Nicky was just trying to be nice. However, Lucy would rather be set on fire than walk into the kitchen, where the supposed Red could be. Nicky does not let go of her arm as she walks through the kitchen. The kitchen staff does not even give them a second look.

"Hey, Red," Nicky calls out. Shit. Lucy hears something drop in the back, causing her heart rate to double. Slowly, Red appears. As she makes her way towards the girls, she stares down Lucy like a predator ready to attack their prey.

"Hey, Ma," Nicky greets Red with a smile, "this is…"  
"Lucy," Red's Russian accent is heavier than it had been before.

"You two…know each other?" Nicky asks confused.

"No," Lucy replies, while crossing her arms in front of her and raising an eyebrow at the Russian woman, waiting for her to challenge Lucy's statement.

"Well…"Nicky says, breaking the stare down, "Lucy's stomach seems to be off… and it's her first day. So I thought ya could give her some crackers or somethin'."

Red does not answer at first; she looks at Lucy for a second, her eyes narrow- "I need to speak with Lucy… alone."

Nicky lowers her eyebrows in confusion, before letting go of Lucy's arm, "Alright, Red."

Red gestures for Lucy to follow her to the back and the young girl does…slowly, staying a good several steps behind the Russian woman. The reach the office and Red walks over to her desk. She opens the top drawer, pulls out a bag of saltines, and tosses it to Lucy before sitting down.

"Lucy," the Russian woman says.

"Galina," Lucy replies, "I mean Red, that's what everyone seems to call you now."

"You can call me whatever you want, moy angel," Red says crossing her arms in front of her chest, mimicking Lucy.

"Fine, bitch, what do you want?"

"What are you doing here?"

"I beg and pleaded, just to see your fucking face again," Lucy replies harshly.

"Haha, you think you're so fucking cute," Red says standing up, her Russian accent becoming thicker with anger, "I repeat, what are you doing here?"

"I am fucking cute. You know what, you're husband thought so as well. Because you know, he fucked me. Your boss thought I was cute as well, and he fucked me. And then because I am just do darn cute, they decided to use me as bait. They knew police were after them, so they used me and I was caught," Lucy stays still, anger rolling off her, causing the room to feel as hot as the pits of hell, "That is why I am fucking here."

"Moy angel…" Red mumbles out, restricting herself from reaching out for the girl.

"Red," Lucy says, "While I am here, stay away from me."


	3. Chapter 3

*** Disclaimer- don't own OITNB…but if I did… It would be a mess. Haha…so I have a terrible problem with not always reading what I write…but yeah.**

**Thank YOU to everyone that reviewed and/or followed the story- it really means a lot to me. AND it really inspires me to stay on this story instead of float to another plot bunny when I know people actually find the story alright**

**Anyways**

**Chapter 3**

"Inmate," the four girls in the bunk turn to face the owner of the voice standing at the door way, a prison guard with a mustache only acceptable for child molesters or porn stars, "McCoy, you've been assigned to a cube."

Lucy stands up, taking her belongings and follows the man out the door and to what her fellow inmates have dubbed as the white suburbia. She keeps her eyes on the guards feet, avoiding the stares. The guard stops suddenly, causing Lucy to look up.

"In here, McCoy," the man with the pornstache says, Lucy's eyes follow in the direction he is referring to, to see Boo. The larger woman smiles at her, causing Lucy to lose whatever appetite she had for dinner later today…and tomorrow. Lucy places her stuff on the metal stand behind the empty bed.

"Hey, doll," Boo greets her, after the guard has left, "looks like we're going to be roomies."  
Lucy ignores her, however, and pulls out a book she had gotten at the prison library earlier. She lies on the bed and begins to read.

"You know," Boo says, "You ignoring me is only persuading me to try harder. I like a chase. And doll, you are going to be worth it."

Lucy continues to read. Or at least tries to. A knock on the wall in front of her catches both of the women's attention. Both look up to see Morello and Nicky. Nicky had been assigned yesterday to the Pink Lady's cube.

"Hey, Luce," Nicky starts adding a crooked smile in the middle, "Looks like we're cube neighbors."

"Oh, it's going to be so exciting," Morello joins it, "It can be like one of those high schools sleepover…gossipin' and doing each others makeup."

"Like a high school sleepover?" Boo interjects, her smile becoming wider as she turns back to Lucy, "Maybe we can experiment with the same gender later."

"Oh, Boo," Morello scolds the larger woman, "Why did you have to say that? Now she won't want to hang out with us."

Nicky looks down at Lucy- hopeful that Morello's words are not true; in return, Lucy gives her a shy smile behind her book.

A few days pass and Lucy is out of the orange and in the gross tanish brownish thing. She chose working for laundry, because it was one of the only things she actually knew how to do…and who would willingly clean women's personals.

She stands in the back, her long hair pulled back into a ponytail, folding shirts. It had been awkward at first, but with the help of her new friends (Cancer, Nicky, and Morello) jail didn't seem like such an awful thing anymore.

Nicky strolls in, a tool belt around her waist and a crooked smile on her lips- one of the lights were broken and the puffy haired girl was here to 'attempt' to fix it.

"Hey, Luce," she says, standing on the other side of the table to which Lucy was folding shirts.

"Nicky," she greets warmly, "you look spiffy in your tool belt."

"Spiffy?"

"Yeah," Lucy replies, looking down at the shirt in her hands, "It is a way of complimenting you without sounding flirty."

"And flirting with me is a bad thing?" Nicky says, leaning forward, placing her elbows on the table, and her chin on the back of her hands.

"Yes, you know I'm straight," Lucy mimics Nicky's new position, "I don't want to give you the wrong idea."

"Are you sure you're not a little bi-curious?"

"Nicky, you're a pretty girl, but…"

"I'm just messing with you Luce," Nicky says standing up straight, "Red would kill me if I turned you gay. Though, if you ever, you know want to see what could happen when you're with a girl skilled as me… what Red doesn't know, won't hurt her."

This throws Lucy into a sudden rage, but she keeps a calm face for her new friend, "Red…she has said something about me?"

"Huh, ah yeah," Nicky replies, "She told me to keep my lustful ways away from you and then something if Russian."

"Hmm," Lucy says, pondering on the Nicky's words, before repeating, "Well, what Red doesn't know won't hurt her."

An alarm sound the room.

"Well I didn't fix the light and you didn't finish the shirts, but it seems like it is time for dinner my dear," Nicky says extending her hand to Lucy. With a smile, she takes it and together, they walk hand-in-hand to the cafeteria.

They sit at what has become their table, along with the nun, yoga master, Pink Lady, and Boo. Their trays are filled with some kind of lasagna and vegetables. Nicky and Lucy chat about life, while the girl's around them gossip about the other prison inmates.

"Do you know what's been wrong with Red, Nicky?" Yoga Jones asks, pulling the two younger girls out of their conversation.

"Nah, she won't tell me anything," she replies picking up her fork, then impersonating Red's accent, she continues, "It is none of your business, Nicky."

"Well, I heard she had talked to her son, Uri, two days ago," Boo says, adding her two cents, "ever since then she has been in a funk."

"Do you think something happened with her shop?" Morello adds, her red-covered lips turning into a frown. 'Doubt it,' Lucy thinks to herself, refusing to acknowledge the girl's topic of interest aloud.

"Well, I sure hope not," Nicky, announces, placing an arm around Lucy.

A day passes and Lucy has finally returned to her book.

Sitting under a tree, she smiles…finally some alone time. In less than a day, it seems that everyone has learned and Lucy and Nicky's sudden extend to their relationship. They just flirted that was all, but rumors floated around that they were doing more than flirting.

Something white suddenly catches the corner of her eye. She flicks her head quickly to see… a chicken. Impossible. But as impossible as it was, it seemed to be happening. Nevertheless, how did it get in?

"Lucy," a Russian accent comes from behind the younger girl.

"Thanks, Red," Lucy replies in frustration, bringing her fingers to the bridge of her nose, rubbing the sides, "you scared away the chicken."

"You lied to me," Red says trying to keep her anger get the best of her; however, she is thrown off by the young girl's statement.

"You know, if you add an extra L to your name, it is literally chicken in Spanish…well hen," she says, ignoring Red, "Gallina... Chicken."

"Lucy, there was no chicken!" Red says now hitting the tree in anger, "this prison is guarded by a fence, a tall electrical fence. There is no way a chicken could get in here."

"Maybe it flew," the young girl replies smoothing down her shirt, before looking back down at her book," I thought I said to stay away from me."

"Vy chertovski suka. Slyshali li vy slovo ya skazal?" Red says crossing her arms on front of her chest, leaning against the tree, "you lied, your request is denied."

Lucy does not reply, keeping her eyes on the book. Red stares at the young girl, trying to keep herself from kicking Lucy in the gut.

"Dmitri was sent to prison a week after me," Red continues after the tension filled silence, "And Vadim, though unknown to his wife, is gay."

"What do you want with me, Galina?" Lucy stands up, throwing her arms out to her sides, "Do you want me to throw things at you? Do you want to yell at me more? Do you want to slap me again?"

"Lucy..." Red begins, but if cut off by the younger girl.

"Galina, I'm not your friend," she says crossing her arms in front of her in defense, "I'm not even your enemy. I just do not want anything to do with you. And I seriously don't know why you'd want to do anything with me. Let's just call it even and avoid each other like the plague."

"But I don't want that," Red replies, throwing her arms down to her sides, "I want to make it up to you. I want to offer you protection here. We can work in the kitchen like old times and nobody would mess with you."

"No," Lucy replies coldly, "I hate cooking. And I don't want your protection. I do not want anything to do with you."

"Fine, be like that," Red replies, her words cold as ice, "don't come to me when you find yourself in trouble."  
"I won't."

Vy chertovski suka. Slyshali li vy slovo ya skazal?- google translate says- You fucking bitch. Have you heard a word I have said to you?


	4. Chapter 4

*disclaimer- don't own OITNB* $so I know why Lucy is in jail, but what do you think?$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

"Hey nicks," Lucy says, sitting on Nicky's bed, laying her head upon the girl' slap.

"Well hello there, my pixie," Nicky replies raking her hand through the younger girl's long hair.

"You told me a week ago that if I ever wanted to know what it was like to... um..." Lucy says, her face going red. She turns her face into Nicky's legs, embarrassment lighting through her.

"Are you asking what I think ya are?" Nicky pulls Lucy's face up, both girls smiling as Lucy nods, "then what are we still doing here."

Both girls stand up and walk out of the suburbs. They try to remain calm, cool, and completely normal, but Lucy can't hold in her giggles anymore as they reach the chapel. It was known to hold different religious meetings and lesbian sex. It all seemed too real for the young woman as Nicky takes her hand an pushes the doors open. They run pass the the lines of chairs, making their way to the stage, to the podium and table. After sliding underneath the table, Nicky pushes Lucy under her.

"Are you sure?" She asks suddenly concerned.

"Course."

Their lips connect, Nicky quickly takes the dominant, pushing her tongue through Lucy's parted lips. Nicky marks herself everywhere on the younger girl, claiming all untouched areas.

Lucy's hands grip the bottom of Nicky's shirt, pulling it up. They part briefly, but once the shirt it off, they immediately reconnect. Nicky repeats the same maneuver with Lucy, but doesn't stop there. She grasps the top of the younger girl's pants and flirts the the skin just above it.

"Nicky," Lucy gasps as the other girl pulls down the pants. Nicky takes this opportunity to trails her lips down Lucy's throat. She pepper's the young girl with kisses as she makes her way down to he bust. As she does this, she rubs the younger girl's nipples through her thin white bra.

If they weren't in the heat of the moment, Nicky would have laughed at the Lucy's undergarments- just as white as her innocence.

She reaches around the back for the clasp and expertly takes it off. Suddenly the sound of the door being pushed open stops the young girls in their tracks.

"I've seem to lost my faith in him," a familiar Russian accent fills the room. Shit.

"I'm sure it will come back to you," the nun replies, "after all he works..."

"In mysterious ways," Red cuts in, "bullshit. I feel like he is trying to fuck me over. I'm the ant and he is the child with a magnifying glass."

Lucy looks at Nicky, dread covering the puffy hair girl's face. Lucy attempts to smile at her.

"I'm sorry," Nicky whispers, as she leans closer to the young girl's ear, her hot breath tickling the young girl's neck.

"We don't have to stop," Lucy whispers back, causing Nicky looks at her and smirk.

"I don't know, Luce," but Nicky doesn't get to finish her thought, for Lucy has pushed her lips against hers, shutting her up.

"I know your angry," the nun says to Red (she laughs at that) "but maybe it's fate, unfinished business that he wants settled."

"Or trying to get back at me for..."

"For what, Red?" The nuns interrupts, " you've changed... For the better. If anything he should be proud at you. You can think of this as a second chance."

"I don't want this chance" she replies, her accent becoming thick, "ona ne khochet etot shans. I just wanted my past to disappear and yet it has come back... kak poshchechina v litso."

Both girls stop then. Lucy feels bad. Really bad. Ill actually. Her hand quickly comes up to her mouth, her skin paling and her cheeks burning.

"Shit," Nicky says, "Luce, are you alright."

She shakes her head quickly.

"We need to get you to the nurse," Nicky says, clasping the the girl's bra back together. Quickly she helps Lucy redress, before pulling back on her own shirt. Nicky begins to stand up, but is pulled back down. Lucy balls up on the floor placing head on top of her knees.

"Stay," she mumbles out, "it will pass."

And so they it there, side by side. Nicky strokes Lucy's back as they listen to Red and Nun Ingalls discuss life and it's cruel ways.

A few days pass and Nicky becomes glued to Lucy's hip. Lucy seemed to become worse, the paleness never leaving. Nicky would constantly offer to take her to the nurse or Healy, but Lucy would only refuse. Even the other girl's began to question Lucy's health.

It isn't until Friday that it seems to take a toll for the worse, however, Lucy does nothing. She's in the laundry room now, folding shirts with Nicky's help.

A guard comes in and looks at Nicky in confusion, "inmate, you don't work in here."

"I'm just helping Lucy."

"I don't care, leave," she says, placing her hands on her hips.

"Lucy is sick and..."

"The girl is fine, inmate," the guard interrupts, "leave now and I won't give you a shot."

With that Nicky gives Lucy a sad look an leaves. The guard leaves as well. Lucy frowns, but continues to fold.

Someone enters the room, causing Lucy to look up and see Boo.

"I thought Nicky would never leave," she says with a smirk.

"Did you send the guard in here?" Lucy questions her, looking back down at the pants in her hands.

"Of course," the bigger replies, "you know, I'm hurt. I thought I told you to come to me, if you felt lonely... And yet, you go to Nicky. Not nice, doll, not nice at all. I think I may have to punish you."

"Please, don't," Lucy replies, fear suddenly filling her to the core. However, Boo doesn't listen and makes her way closer to the younger girl. Boo pushes the weak girl against the wall.

"I promise, I can make you feel better than that drug addict," Boo whispers in her ear. Lust shakes her head as she tries to push the larger woman away. Boo laughs as she places her hand upon Lucy's breast.

"Oh how you've been torturing me," Boo moans as the door opens. Lucy looks pass Boos head, hoping whoever has entered the room would help.

Red looks at Lucy with her famous look of disappointment before leaving.

Google translate-

ona ne khochet etot shans- she doesn't want this chance

kak poshchechina v litso- like a slap to the face

*literally wrote this on my phone :( sorry it's short... I'm out of town, but I'm still trying to update. Anyways reviews are love :)*


	5. Chapter 5

*Disclaimer. I don't own Red or the color. I do own Lucy, however.*

Haha... So wrote on phone again. I promise the next chapter will actually be twice as long to make up for the two phone written ones.

Hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy reviews :)

Chapter 5

Red walks out of the laundry room- anger and something else she can't quite describe bubbles through her. She stops in her tracks, the image of Lucy and Boo replaying in her mind. With a huff, she leans against the nearest wall. She was still in her chefs clothes: the top of her hair hidden in a long black cloth, her white uniform, and her black apron. Unfortunately she had spilt some of the spaghetti sauce on her shirt and she wanted to get it removed immediately, but she could find any baking soda.

She pulls her glasses away from her eyes, letting them hang from her neck. Red was not stupid or deaf- she heard the rumors of Nicky and Lucy. It was hard to ignore them; their hands were always clasped, their smiles glued on their faces when the other was near, the constant whispers at night...

The bell rings, signaling that lunch was beginning. Red doesn't move. Women make their way out into the hallway, most of them look at Red in confusion.

Suddenly Red hears someone running down the halls towards her. She looks up to see Nicky with her long puffy hair flying behind her, determination covering her face. Probably off to see Lucy. Secretly, Red hopes Nicky catches Boo and the younger woman together. However, her mothering instinct kicks in.

"Nicky, stop," she calls out to her, and Nicky does so, stopping just in front of Red, "you know not to run in the hallways."

"Ma, I know just..."

"Nothing is that important- if Mendez catches you..." Red interrupts, only to be cut off in return.

"Lucy is! And she is sick," Nicky replies, "she can barely get out of bed."

"Boo is in there with her," Red says, "I'm sure she is fine."

"No," Nicky breathes out, fisting her hair with her hands, "No! We have to go help her Ma. Boo warned me that Lucy was going to be hers... Oh god. She is probably terrified right now."

No more has to be said. Both women dash towards the laundry room. Nicky pulls the door open and sprints to the back. Red quickly follows her. Boo was no where to be seen.

Nicky makes her way to where Lucy was standing earlier, to see the young woman on the floor, with tears running down her porcelain face and her small arms wrapped around her knees. Nicky quickly sits upon the floor, brings Lucy's head into her lap, and hushes to her like a mother trying to calm an infant.

Red feels as if her lungs have given out and her heart crumbling to piece. This was her fault. She should have noticed something was wrong. She should have seen past her anger for the young woman and realized she was in danger. It was all her fault.

Red crouches down to the floor in front of the two girls. Hesitantly she pushes Lucy's long dark hair away from her face, quickly feeling the heat of the young girl's fever.

Slowly Lucy opens her large green bloodshot eyes to meet blue ones holding in tears. With as much powers as she can muster, she lunges for Red, wrapping her arms around the older woman's neck. Taken back for a second, Red quickly readjusts her position and brings Lucy into her lap.

Nicky, too concerned for her friend, isn't bothered by the sudden change, though slightly confused

"Red," she says standing up, "should I go get any thing... Anyone?"

"Yes," she replies quickly, "a cold rag and Caputo."

Nicky is out the door in a matter if seconds.

"I'm so sorry, moy angel," Red whispers as she stokes the younger girl's back, "I am so very sorry."

"I can't..." Lucy replies, just as quietly, "I can't do shit with I'm sorry."

Red looks down at the younger girl, guilt still filling her emotions, "well what can I do?"

Lucy doesn't reply right away. The sound of a single dryer filling the room. Slowly the younger woman unwraps her arms and places her dainty hands upon Red's shoulders. She looks up into the blue eyes she has missed more than she has been letting on and says, " Galina, don't leave me. Don't leave me ever again."

Red knows that Lucy means more than just what happened earlier, but always- when she left her for the mob wives, her husband, her work... Hell, even going to jail.

"I won't, moy angel," she replies softly, pulling Lucy back into a right embrace. No more words are said, however, a silent agreement is made that a long discussion will take place, once Lucy can stand on her own two feel without uncontrollably swaying side to side. As they wait, Red stokes Lucy's hair, smoothing the curls down, only for them to bounce back up. With time, the young girl is asleep.

The sound of the door opening awakes their silence. Rushing feet come around the corner along with the sounds of wheels. Red looks up to see a gurney, Cupote, one of the guard, and a medic. The guard picks up the weak girl from the chef's lap, holding her in a bridal style, then cautiously laying her down. The cold rag is placed in Lucy's head and yet she remains asleep.

Lucy is quickly wheeled out of the room, along with the guard and Caputo. Red' unshed tears finally fall. Nicky looks at her in concern.

"Ma?" She questions.

"I promised I wouldn't leave her," she says more to herself than to Nicky, "what if she wakes up and I'm not there?"

"I'm sure it will be fine," Nicky replies, placing an arm around Red in comfort. She knew her Ma and Lucy had some sort of friendship outside of the prison, but she didn't realize how much Lucy really meant to Red until now.

"No, it won't."


	6. Chapter 6

**That awkward moment when you write something but forget to upload…**

*** **Disclaimer- don't own OITNB, just Lucy and any other OCs I decide to hit you with…repeatedly…In the heart…*

Chapter 5

"Why Lucy?" Red says pushing Boo against the cold hard kitchen prison wall. Boo does not push the older woman back, allowing Red to let loose her anger- then the larger woman will strike back.

"How could you hurt her?" Red's heart beats wildly against her chest, never has she wanted to hurt someone so bad in her life.

"She hurt me," Boo replies finally, pushing Red back, towards the metal counter behind her, "That slutty tease."

"Don't you dare talk about her like that!" Red says, punching Boo's left jaw. Boo's eyes seem to go dark as she pushes Red once more, the middle of her back hitting the middle of the counter. Both of the women never thought their friendship would end like this.

"Lucy is a whore," Boo, hits red in her gut, "what are you going to do about it, Red? Remove me from your 'family'?"

"No," Red grabs the butcher knife behind her, causing Boo's eyes to grow, "I am going to kill you."

Quickly, Boo takes a step back, fear she has not felt in years returning in a second, "You…you wouldn't do that. You do not have the guts. You're all talk, Red."

"You wanna bet, lyubov'?" Red takes a step forward, her grip tightening on the knife, causing her knuckles to go white.

"Red," She hears a cheery male voice behind her, both women turn to see Mendez, with a large smile hiding under his pornstache, "Red, never have I thought that I would get to say this. Threatening an inmate…you're going to solitary."

Both of the women's heart drops. Neither of them expected to hear that either. Mendez walks over and takes the knife out of Red's hands before wrapping her wrists in cuffs.

"Red," Boo calls out to her, "I am so sorry."

There is not a single eye, which does not turn towards Red, as Mendez walks her to the SHU. She keeps her heard up high though, happy that Lucy is not there to see how far she has fallen. In all reality, she is terrified. Everyone has heard stories of the SHU- majority of them have told that when you come back, you are no longer the person you once were.

It had been a week before Lucy returned. A smile was on her face as she skips, yes skips, to her cube to collect her things. She is moving in with Cancer, Miss Rosa, and she was no longer paler…well than someone with cancer is. Earlier, Lucy had told that joke to Miss Rosa and she was lucky enough to receive a chuckle. She had also been told from her parents that she would have a visitor tomorrow, an old friend.

Morello and Nicky come up to her new cube, located still in the suburbs, but now closest to the guard; neither attempting to hide their smiles that the younger woman was back.

"Oh, Lucy, love," Morello, says, sitting down on Lucy's new bed, "We were so worried about you…but now you look better than ever."

"Lucy," Nicky places her arm upon the younger woman's shoulders, "I am really glad you're back, pixie."

"I am too," she says with a smile, and then it hits her, "Where is Red?"

Both women look down at the floor, as if there was something there suddenly more interesting than their conversation. It does not take much time for Lucy to become ticked, so she repeats herself.

"Red," Morello is the one to answer, "She got herself thrown in the SHU. Should be out though, soon…I hope. The food is even crappier without her."

Relief washes over Lucy. Everything she said during Red, she regretted the second she woke up. She wanted to yell at Red. Hurt her for everything she ever did to her. Leaving her when Boo attacked. Slapping her. The damn woman was angry with her for keeping her silence. All she ever did was try to help. Galina was selfish and Lucy was tired of being the crutch. Never will she let Galina in her life again.

"Well, I have good news," Lucy says happily, surprising both of the other women with her sudden cheerfulness, "I'm getting a visitor tomorrow!"

"Oh my," Morello sequels, "We have to take you to Sophia."

"Sophia?" Lucy questions. This is the only time Lucy will say the hairdressers name in anything other than pure happiness. Morello grabs Lucy by the arm and pulls her out of the suburbs. With a smile on the Pink Lady's face, they make it to the prison salon.

"Soph!" Morello calls out to the tall woman shaving a girl around Lucy's age head. The woman named Sophie turns off the electric shaver, turns towards the women at the door and smiles.

"Hello, Morello," She says, placing the hair tool on the table beside her and picks up brush, "And who is your friend?"

"Oh, this is Lucy," she replies, dramatically flaring out her arms towards Lucy, showing her off like a game show model, "She is getting a visitor tomorrow."

"Oh that's cool," the young woman sitting down says, tracing her baldhead, "I got one, too. I'm Poussey, by the way."

Lucy smiles and gives a little wave.

"So, darling, what are you thinking?" Sophia asks, gesturing for the girl to sit in the empty chair beside Poussey.

"Um, I'm not really sure," Lucy, admits, taking her curling hair into her right hand, wrapping it around her finger. Sophia takes the side of her hair and folds it just to under her chin.

"A visitor…" Sophia says, "Maybe something bold."

Lucy smiles, "I've never had short hair before."

"Never?" Poussey asks.

"Never," Lucy replies, "My parents forced me into ballet at the age of three. It was a rule at my studio to keep your hair long so it can be easily put up in a bun. Later it became at rule at my house."

_ Lucy held her head high as she limps out of the larger dance studio- studio B. So what if she fell out of her turn? It is not as she has not done it before. She limps through the lobby, making her way to the nearest couch. Quickly, she unties and unwraps the ribbons from her pointe shoe and pulls off the slipper. She rubs her hands up and down her sore ankle. She moans in pain as she hits the new sensitive spot._

_ "There is my little klutz," a male sounds, causing her to look up to see her best friend and the studio owner's son, Jasper, holding an ice pack._

_ "Rude," Lucy replies taking the ice. Jasper chuckles as he runs his large hand through his thick blonde hair. Lucy sequels in pain as she places the pack on the spot, before immediately letting it go. Peter crouches down in front of her and picks up the ice; before taking the girl's ankle in his hands and holding the pack securely on her ankle._

_ "Wimp," he teases her as she squirms in his hand._

_ "I should quit," Lucy, complains, as she places her hands upon her face, "I am a terrible dancer. I never even wanted to be a dancer… but I can't quit."_

_ "Lucy," Jasper says- his caramel colored eyes reaching hers as she peeks behind her fingers, "You shouldn't be afraid of your parents. They are just people."_

_ "Ha," She says, removing her hands completely now, "You've met my parents… you know how intimidating they can be. Remember when I told them I did not want to play the piano anymore- they took away my freedom for weeks. I wasn't allowed to hang out with you, or Jess, or Tommy…"_

_ "Lucy, if you don't want to dance, you shouldn't have too. I'm tired of seeing you with twisted ankles."_

_ "Oh, I am sorry to be such a burden to you," sarcasm drips from her voice, as she nudges him in the chest with her other pointe shoe covered foot._

_ "You know what I mean," he says, tracing a made up pattern on her ankle, "Anyways if they take away your freedom again, I will just kidnap you."_

_ Lucy's heart thumps in her chest at double speed. It was hard not to like Jasper. He had the looks of the boys you are read about in those horrible teen romances, but the personality of a lovable Disney sidekick._

_ "I mean," he says, breaking the silence, "I was planning on kidnapping you anyways, after we both turn eighteen, but if I need to do it earlier…"_

_ Lucy sides down to the floor next to him and kisses him upon the cheek. Quickly, Jasper's face heats up causing both teens to smile. Everyone at the studio teased them, calling them the modern Romeo and Juliet._

_ The Romeo moves away, however. His parents force him to leave for college, wanting the best education for him. And Juliet stays. She quits dance, much to her parent's distaste; then, she tries something she has never done before, get a job._

Sophia finishes drying Lucy's hair. She runs her small hand through it, with a grin on her face. It was perfect. Better than perfect. Quickly she gets up and hugs Sophia.

"Thank you," she says, pulling back, "I love it!"

"You're very welcome," Sophia says, smiling back.

"You look good, Luce," Poussey says, her legs are crossed in front of her, and a smirk is glued on her face.

"Come on, Lucy," Morello says, taking her by the arm, "We gotta go show you off."

Poussey follows along as they leave the salon. They make their way to one of the rec areas. The women all sit together at a table and are quickly joined by Nicky and another unknown larger girl to Lucy.

"Aw, pix," Nicky says, "You look good. More mature actually."

Lucy giggles at the compliment, "I've always wanted short hair, just never thought I would actually be able to do it.

"You look like an older Shirley Temple," Poussey's friend says.

"Taystee, isn't that a drink?" Nicky asks.

"Yeah, but it was also this adorable girl," Taystee replies, "She was like in a ton of movies."

"An icon, really," Poussey interjects.

The night comes to an end. Miss Rosa even compliments Lucy on her hair. She could not wait for tomorrow to come. She dreams of red hair and a cold cement room. Lucy wakes up feeling regret and sick once more. However, now she knows the reason. She pulls a bucket from under her bed and lets out the morning sickness.

Miss Rosa is already away, when she hears Lucy puking. Slowly she rises from her own bed and sits beside Lucy. Hesitantly at first, she begins to stroke the young girls back.

"They should have transferred you, little fairy," Miss Rosa whispers to the young girl, "You shouldn't have to be in this hell hole, while in your condition."

"It's fine," Lucy replies just as softly, "Thank you."

Miss Rosa takes the bucket from the younger woman and places it on the ground. Gradually, she helps the younger girl, back down, but this time, with Lucy's head in her lap. Miss Rosa runs her hands through Lucy's hair, coaxing her into falling back to sleep.

When Lucy wakes up, Miss Rosa is back in her bed. With a smile on her face, she gets ready for the day. She even puts on some of the lipstick Morello had lent her. Today was the day.

After breakfast, she makes her way to the visitor's room. She spots his blonde hair immediately. Quickly, she runs to him, throwing her arms around his neck. His arms quickly wrap around the middle of her back.

"I have missed you so much," he whispers in her ear, pulling her tighter against him.


	7. Chapter 7

*** Disclaimer- don't own Red or Gina or the prison, but I do own my ideas and OCs* **

**Author's Note- sorry, I went out of town again, to the middle of nowhere. So another mobile upload. Luckily I did write two chapters (one on phone and one on computer) so I will be uploading another later. Anyways reviews are love :) **

**Chapter 7**

"Lucy," He holds her hands in his, "I thought we agreed that if one of us were to ever get into trouble, it would be me."

Lucy giggles in remembrance, "I'm sorry, I beat you to it."

"So," he says, finally letting go, leaning against the back of his chair, arms crossed, "how are you?"

"Jasper, I'm fine. Really."

"Lucy-love, no one told me you were in jail. I mean a few weeks ago we were making plans for you to move with me and finally have that family we dreamed of as kids. And now?"

"I know, I know. I messed up. You didn't have to visit..."

"I wanted to," he says, interrupting her sentence, "I still love you and I still want a dream... I mean if you still..."

"Jasper, I'm in prison," she says placing her hands on her face, not wanting tears to fall, "I don't think I fit into our dream anymore."

"Lucy," he says, taking her hands away from her face and back into his, "you are the dream. And for one I think this would be a funny story for our kids one day. 'Sonny, boy, you're petite lovely mama, she was in prison.' They would be the most well behaved kids ever."

"Jasper," Lucy says, "I have four years in here."

"Good," he replies, "we may actually mature a little before we get married."

"No," she looks into is caramel eyes, the ones she use to prefer blue over, "not good. Jas- I'm pregnant."

"Really?" He replies, a smile spreading in his face.

"You're happy?"

"I mean, the timing isn't perfect" he says, with a chuckle, "but yes, I'm very happy."

"Times up," a guard calls out.

"That was incredibly short," Jasper stands up, frowning, "but I will be back and we can have prison dates."

Lucy laughs as Jasper pulls her into a hug. He pulls her tightly once more against him an whispers those three words everyone wants to hear. However, her reaction wasn't of the norm. Her stomach tightens and she feels a sudden guilt for reasons she can't place.

"I know," she says, pulling out of his arms. They say they will see each other soon and go their separate ways.

Lucy makes her way back through the prison, but is stopped by a girl she had once seen with red. This other girl was not much older than Lucy. Freckles peppered her face and her hair was cut short in a pixie cut. Lucy can't tell if the girl is actually frowning or if it is just she natural look.

"You're Lucy?" She asks.

"Yes?"

"I'm Gina," the girl says, "While Red is gone, Healy has assigned you to kitchen. Just staff, not head. Since we are down one person."

"I really don't cook..."

"Says the girl who's only job is working in a cafe," Gina cuts her off with a mumble, " come on, I'll show you around."

Lucy agrees and follows Gina to the cafeteria and into the kitchen. It is empty for the most part. The knifes which could be considered as weapons are locked up as well as spices. Gina explains to her that she will mainly be in front helping hand out trays. 'This is Red's kitchen,' Lucy thinks to herself. She feels like a trespasser. When Lucy had worked for the Reznikov's it had taken a week for Galina to even let her take a step in the kitchen area. Now she is walking around this kitchen freely, while Red isn't here.

"Lucy," Gina says causing Lucy to turn around and enter back into the present, "can I ask you a question?"

"Yeah," she replies with a smile, "shoot."

"What was yours and Red's relationship?" Gina asks, "i know it's personal. You don't have to answer."

"No," Lucy says, "it's fine. I use to work for her and her husband. That was all."

"You weren't friends?"

"I suppose we were once."

"That makes sense then," Gina says, "come on, we can go now."

"Wait," Lucy calls out stopping Gina, "what do you mean 'that makes sense'?"

"Did no one tell you?" Gina replies with another question.

"Tell me what?"

"Well Red went to the SHU because of you," Gina starts, "well not really because of you. She got angry at Boo, because she had hurt you... And well she threatened to kill her, after Boo called you some names."

"You're joking."

"No," Gina replies, " wish I was, though. It's so unlike them- so unlike her."

"Boo?"

"No, Red," Gina says, as they walk towards one of the rec rooms now, "she is a good person and all, but she doesn't really do things for other people, unless she knows she will get something in return. But you have to be like that to survive in here."

Lucy nods her in agreement, but in her head, she still can't understand why Red would get herself thrown in the SHU for defending Lucy. It didn't make sense to her. Gina's words puzzle her for the rest of the day.

At night, Lucy lies in the hard bed, pulling her sheet close to her chin, it finally hits her. Not once has Red done anything but try to help Lucy while in here. Sure, they argued like cats and dogs, but that was because Lucy was too stubborn for her own good. She will thank and apologize to Red, she decides before falling asleep.

Morning sickness, is something Lucy could live without. Miss Rosa runs her fingers though Lucy's hair calming her, while the young woman wonders when the other inmates will realize what is truly wrong with her.

A week passes and Jasper sticks to his word. Every chance he gets, he visits her. Already they discuss names and places. If it's a boy, they will name him Elliott. If it's a girl... Well they haven't quite decided that name yet. Lucy's stomach however barely grows. A late bloomer, like her mother. But when the baby does decided to pop up, her stomach will be the size of a watermelon.

Lucy is back in the kitchen, cleaning up with Gina, when she hears a familiar Russian accent, sound near the area she is in. She looks up, to see Red walking in. Her glasses are on the top of her head and her arm are crossed.

"Hi," Lucy says with a smile.

"Hi," Red replies.


	8. Chapter 8

* Disclaimer- the usual. Don't own OITNB. Duh. But can we just all agree that Kate's breasts looked fabulous in the instagram picture Natasha took before Conan. Perfect. Now my iphone background.*

**Chapter 8**

"Is the stuff in?" Red asks Gina. The younger woman, reaches under the counter, unlocks the door, and pulls out a familiar box labeled Neptune Produce. All feelings that had changed for Red instantly come back. Lucy watches as the two women open the box, her arms folding across her chest.

"Red?" Lucy says, trying to keep her right foot from stomping onto the floor like a child, "Red!"

"Lucy," Red replies, not bothering to turn around, "You can leave now."

"Do you know how dangerous that is?" the younger woman says, ignoring Red's words, "I thought you wouldn't be working with them anymore. If someone catches you…"

"For you," Red says, handing Lucy a jar of coco butter, "For stretch marks. And I'll be fine."

"You knew?" Lucy says, uncrossing her arms, taking the jar from the older woman.

"I'm not as blind as you like to believe," Red smirks, turning around back to Gina, "I've always liked the name Anya, by the way."

Lucy does not say anything after that. Holding the jar in her hand, she walks quickly back into the suburbs. Red still seemed the same. That much excites and scares Lucy. As she sits upon the hard mattress, her shaky hands come to her stomach. Red knew. Who else knew? Without a doubt, Lucy believes Red will find some way to use this against her. Lucy should have not accepted the gift. She should have left when she was told. Sometimes, she can just be so stupid. Lucy lays back, her hands trailing up and down her stomach.

A weight is suddenly placed at the bottom on Lucy's bed. She opens her eyes, to see Nicky with a cucumber. Lucy looks at Nicky, confusion evident on her face. Nicky slowly catches on and lets out a laugh.

"Oh, no," Nicky says, "Not for you. I had to raid the kitchen, before Red's starts counting the vegetables. It is for me and my new girl…since you know…Ha. How are ya?"

"I'm fine," Lucy replies, "Just super duper fine. So fine, in fact, I am practically the definition."

"That didn't make much sense, pix," Nicky says bringing her legs up on the bed into a crossing position, "Red's back."

"Why should that change how I feel. It does not. It should not. She is just a person."

"She didn't seem like just a person when you were crying in her arms," Nicky's eyes widen at her own words, "Okay, shoot. Time for some explaining."

"Explain what?" Lucy asks, closing her eyes, "Red is just a person."

"Is she?"

"Nope, she's a penguin." Lucy says, sitting up now, her hands finally leaving her stomach, "Someone should tell her. A retarded penguin."

"I repeat," Nicky gives Lucy a nudge on her shoulder, a smile growing on her face, "You're not making sense, pix."

"It's just a joke," Lucy says with a frown, "A god awful joke."

Nicky nods her head. But something on Lucy's lap catches her eyes, "What is that?"

Nicky picks up the jar and holds it in front of Lucy, "You, pix, a full of mysteries… time to start unraveling them."

"My life is a mess."

"Then let's work on this one part at a time," Nicky grabs Lucy's hands in hers, "What should we tackle first?"

"I…" Lucy starts, "I'm so stupid. I thought that I cared for her. Really cared. I would have done anything for her. I did do anything she ever asked of me. Nevertheless, the one thing I asked of her, she ignores completely. I told her to stop working with the mafia. Begged her really. So stupid. Why would she listen to me? I was just some girl with a schoolgirl crush. And then out of the blue, Jasper shows up and… and…"

"Wait, who's Jasper?" Nicky says interrupting Lucy.

"He's…"Lucy pulls her legs to her chest, wrapping her arms around her knees.

"Too much unraveling, huh?" Nicky says stopping Lucy.

"I look at her sometimes and it's like nothing changed," Lucy continues anyways, "that I'm still that awestruck girl and she is still Galina. But really, I don't know who she is. I don't think I ever really did."

"Well you know," Nicky says, pulling Lucy up, "Everyone should be just about out of the showers now. It would probably make you feel better."

"Right," Lucy says, picking up her stuff, "Don't tell anyone what I said, Nicky."

"My lips are sealed, Lucy," Nicky replies as Lucy walks away. Nicky was right, Lucy thinks to herself as she makes her way into the bathroom. For the most part, it was empty. Quickly, she makes her way to the farthest stall and turns on the cold water. She strips and shakes in relief. Though the water was cold, quiet moments like this were rare.

Suddenly a pang in her stomach causes all her relaxed thoughts to disappear. She looks down at the water to see it slowly turning red.

"No!" Lucy yells, falling to the ground. Her hands cover her face, as tears begin to fall. No- is all she can think. She hears foots steps running towards her, but she does not bother to left her head.

"Lucy?" a quiet voice calls down to her, "It's going to be all right."

The quiet woman who works in the kitchen leaves then and returns with a CO. They help Lucy up and into a wheel chair; she is taken once more to the infirmary. That night, Lucy feels cold. No blanket or sweatshirt changes it. She feels empty and cold. Miss Rosa is not in the cube with her that night either, due to some blood vomiting. Never had Lucy felt so alone. She does not try to stop the tears from falling down her face. What she does not hear, however, is the soft steps coming her way. Extra weight is added beside her as larger arms envelop her into a caring embrace.

"Life isn't supposed to be easy, moy angel," a familiar Russian accent whispers into Lucy's ears, "but we move on."

"I'm tired of moving on," Lucy replies, wrapping her arms across her own chest, "I'm tired of it. Moving on from Jasper, my family, this child, you. Im tired of moving on. I'm sick and tired of giving up the things I care about. I feel as if I have no control over my own life, Galina. I just want some control."

"Tonight," Red replies, "Was not something anyone should have to live through, something no one can control. It just happens. But you, Lucy, you have control, more than you realize. A single word, a single smile, a single look, given by you, affects everyone you meet, moy angel."

"Including you?" the younger woman just barely mumbles out.

"Always."

Lucy picks her head off the older woman's chest and looks her in the eyes, blue eyes meeting green. And just then, it's as though nothing has changed. Lucy places her hands around Red's face and brings the older woman's lips to hers. Red can taste the tears.

Somehow, everything became wrong and right at the same time.

In the morning, however, Red is gone. And Lucy's actions finally hit her. She kissed Red. She actually kissed Red. What was wrong with her? Red must hate her. If Jasper finds out… Yes, Jasper knew about Lucy's girl crush and that nothing had come from it .But… Ugh, she was so stupid. Lucy pulls her sweatshirt closer to her body as she stands up. Quickly she makes her bed and leaves. Heading for the kitchen.

She walks in, avoiding the looks from Gina and the other women already working. Soon, Lucy will have to join them, waking up just as early. No longer with the privilege of pregnancy. Hesitantly she makes her way to the back, to where she hopes Red will be.

It seems her luck was back, for there the redheaded woman is, sitting at her desk going over papers. Lucy closes the door, but stays near it, not daring to break Red's bubble once more.

"I'm sorry," she says. Red's head does not pick up however, but silence does not fill the room.

"For what?" her Russian accent seems to be lighter than usual.

"Oh, don't give me that crap," Lucy walks over to the desk, placing her hands on the top, "You know what for. I kissed you."

"Its fine," Red replies, looking up to Lucy finally.

"No, it's not, "Lucy's voice raises an octave, "It was defiantly not fine. Just admit it."

"I repeat, Lucy, its fine. You were distressed and I was comforting you. Stuff like that happens, moy angel," Red replies, pulling her glasses off her eyes, letting them hang around her neck.

"Galina," Lucy says, her heart pounding, "You know that wasn't the only reason why. Being stressed may have given me the confidence, but you know, I wanted to do that for a while. Now admit it."

"Admit what?" Red says standing up and walking closer to Lucy. Lucy takes a step back in confusion. They repeat this, until Lucy's back is against the door.

"That I've wanted nothing more than to have you in this exact position for years," Red's accent returns to its harsh tone, "That I use to wonder if you lips tasted as delicious as they looked. That I hate you, for what you've made me feel."

However, Red takes a step back, "Forget what I've said. You were right. It was a mistake. But, its fine."

"Red?" Lucy asks, as the older woman sits back down at her desk, "It doesn't have to be a mistake."

"Yes, it does," Red puts her glasses back behind her ears and picks up the forgotten pen, "How can a bird, and fish be together? They are too different. Stay with your other fish, Lucy."

"I'll grow wings," Lucy replies, with a smile, before leaving Red to her work.


	9. Chapter 9

*Disclaimer- don't own OITNB. Would be cool, though? Right? Haha, no. I can't write. But I do own Lucy, her dead fetus, Jasper, and any other OCs that may decide to show up…*

**Chapter 9**

"Your hair," Jasper says, thumbing his fingers upon the cold metal table between them, "I never told you how much I like it. Its you."

"I just told you I lost the baby and you comment on my hair," Lucy replies, placing her hand upon Jasper's, stopping his strumming, "This post aggressive thing you do, you cant do it while I'm in here. Just tell me."

"Lucy, I love you," he takes her hands in his completely, "We discussed earlier that this timing wasn't right. Moreover, I admit, I am disappointed, but it does not change a thing. I just wish I could have been there to comfort you."

"Why are you such a nice guy?"

"I remember you asking me that a couple of times," he replies with a chuckle, "But is it such a crime for caring about you."

It should be- Lucy thinks automatically. Just because he is a good guy, doesn't mean Lucy is a good girl. She was going to tell him.

"Do you remember Galina?"

"How could I not," he smirks, letting go of her hands, and brings his arms across his chest, "She was the only thing you talked about, when I first moved back home."

"She is in here," Lucy mimics Jasper's pose.

"Good."

"Good?"

"Yes," he chuckles, "I was worried you wouldn't have anyone here to turn to; someone to talk to when I am not here."

"Jas," Lucy says, her arms unfolding in front of her, "Shouldn't you be worried? I mean… What are we? You have all of these big plans for our future, yet the only other person who I have truly cared about romantically besides you, is in here…with me."

"Lucy," He smiles, causing his caramel eyes to sparkle, "I trust you. When your time in here is up, we can talk about me having something to worry over; nevertheless, for now, you have four years. A lot can happen in that time. We can make these extravagant plans all we want, but until its time, I believe you are free from any obligation to me. Until your time here is up, I do not want you to have to make a decision. Now do not get me wrong, I do not want to hear about the lesbian adventures with prison, because I will be jealous."

"What?" She replies with a matching smile, "You want your own lesbian prison adventure?"

"Of course," suddenly, Jasper looks at his hands unsure, "But all I am saying is, I know you are the one for me, you always have been… you've ruined me, but I may not be the one for you. Whomever you choose to be with, I will be jealous, but I am not selfish enough, to not let you live your life."

"And in four years?" Lucy asks.

"In four years, you need to make your decision Lucy," He says standing up, "You won't be able to have us both."

Lucy stands up as well, and immediately brings him to her. That was not what she expected from him. His words, however, as confusing and jumbled as they were, seemed sincere. In addition, it made her worry. Always has Jasper been a planner. Their friends would joke around saying he had his life planned by age three. But not planning four years…there has to be something wrong.

"I'll see you soon, Lucy-love," he whispers before pecking her on the lips.

"Definitely," she replies, before both leave the visitor's room. It is going to be dinner soon, so she makes her way to the kitchen. Lucky for her, today was her last day in the kitchen. Tomorrow, she will be in the library with Taystee and all will be well. No confusion or flightless fish…just books.

Lucy pulls her hair out of her face before putting on a hair net. She then puts one of the aprons over her head.

"Tell me about this growing wings business," a familiar voice sounds through her ears and foreign hands grab and tie the back of the apron.

"Nicky, I do not know what you are talking about," Lucy replies, not turning around.

"I may not know the details, pix, but nothing in this prison gets past me," Nicky walks over to the counter Lucy is facing and leans against it, "I know Red won't say anything, but I am positive I can get something out of you."

"Why does it matter to you?"

"I care about both of you, obviously," She says, crossing her arms, "I will not let you to ruin each other's lives. She was right about Jasper. You should stay with him. He seems like a decent person. Red, on the other hand, needs to stay in power here. And not just for her benefit. She takes care of us. Intentional or not, if you two try anything, she will lose her power."

"Not saying anything was going to happen, but how could I being with her ruin her status…her 'power'?" Lucy narrows her eyes as Nicky frowns.

"She would do anything for you, Lucy," Nicky replies, "Anything."

With that, Nicky leaves. Lucy knows, however, that Nicky's words cannot be true. Red has never done anything for Lucy. Well, has never gone out of her way for the younger woman. Other women enter the kitchen and begin their work. With much distaste, Lucy joins them. Tonight was lasagna and vegetables. Once the food is prepared, some of the women leave, but Lucy stays behind, cleaning the dishes. Gina enters the kitchen with a box in her arms. Lucy waves to the other woman, before she leaves.

Neptunes Produce.

Instantly, Lucy is given an idea. Maybe, Red would listen to her now. Quickly, the young woman takes off the apron and hair net. She catches her reflection in a pan and then runs her hands through her short hair. Cautiously she makes her way to the back of the kitchen. The head chef's office. Lucy sits in the spinning chair and places her feet on the desk, her right ankle crossing over the left. And she waits.

Red enters with a smile on her face, before she sees Lucy. Her fiery red hair is hidden in another black cloth and her glasses hang from her neck. She hesitantly takes a step towards the younger woman, "What are you doing in here?"

"Just waiting for you," Lucy replies, with a pout "Or am I not allowed to do that?"

"Wha…what do you want?" Red stutters.

Lucy smiles at this; it is a rare occurrence for the older woman to stutter, "To say hi. Does it always have to be something more?'

"Dealing with you?" Red replies quickly, "Yes. What do you want?"

"Really, just to say hi," Lucy stands up and struts over to Red, hardly an inch of separation, "I don't like it when people avoid me after I kiss them, Galina."

"I told you to forget about it," Red doesn't move, "That's not my name anymore."

"Why?" Lucy whispers, "Does it remind you of who you use to be? A powerless wife, following orders like a dog. Your life could have been different. But that would have mean you would have listened to me… the child. Is not that what you use to call me behind my back to those blonde bitches? A child?"

"And what do you think would have happened if I listened to you?" Red questions, her voice no higher than Lucy's was, "We would have both been killed."

Lucy does not break eye contact, however, as she places a hand upon her left arm.

_"You lying bitch," Natasha yells, pointing to Lucy, "I knew we shouldn't have trusted you."_

_ "I was only trying to help," Lucy replies softly, willing her tears from falling._

_ "Help? Help!" Natasha yells, "Going off to the Italians to trade part of one of our companies is not helping. You know that. You've wanted us to fall, to fail. Going against us is not going to get your girlfriend out of prison!"_

_ "I swear, I did not know they were going to try to steal it all," Lucy looks down at her hands, "I thought they would…"_

_ "What?" Natasha laughs, "This is a mafia, not kindergarteners at recess. We do not trade or barter. We take. We Kill. We do whatever we can to become the most powerful. And you, are just a child. Even if they were considering a trade, they wouldn't do it through you."_

_ "You're right, Tasha," Lucy finally lets the tears fall, "I'm sorry."_

_ "You're lucky, you know," Natasha says, walking over to the younger girl, sitting in the chair next to her, "They could have done worse than mark your arm. They could have killed you. Vlad went easy on you, Lu."_

_ Lucy's grip on her injured arm tightens. Natasha was right. _

_ "You should leave," Natasha says, "really, child. This life was not meant for you. Galina is gone. You have no reason to be working with us anymore. You should have a normal life…That boy who was here earlier; he could be your way out. He could give you a real life. Not one like Galina's or mine. But a real life, where you get to make your own decisions."_

_ "I don't know what is wrong with me," Lucy says, "you're right, as always. But I can't. I just can't. Not until she is free and I've done something to help."_

_ "Your ideas…"_

_ "I know, they're childish," Lucy cuts her off._

_ "Yes, but that wasn't what I was going to say," Natasha continues, "they're noble. But, misguided. What has Galina done for you?"_

_ "She's the one person in my life who has never expected me to be anything other than myself," Lucy laughs, "And I know that sounds stupid. However, its how our relationship has always been. Everyone in my life has expected stuff from me- to make perfect grades, to be a ballerina, to be the perfect daughter, to be with Jasper, to get married and have kids and have a boring typical life. Not once did she make me feel that I had to become this person that I do not want to be."_

_ "That is stupid," Natasha replies, removing Lucy's hand from her arm, "But, it makes sense. I know how you feel. Expectations can drive someone crazy. I mean, I am expected to be this bitch, right?"_

_ "You are a bitch."_

_ "See, I play the part rather well," Natasha laughs, "but, Lucy, you shouldn't throw your life away, because she makes you feel a certain way. Now, im going to fix up your arm, after that, you are going to find that boy from earlier and start a real life."_

"Or," Lucy says, "We could have had a real life. Run away. Changed our names. You could have opened a real café and I would have gone to college. We could have had a real happy life."

"You know it wouldn't have worked."

"I hate you," Lucy places her arms around Red's neck, "Sometimes, I really do hate you."

"The feeling is mutual," Red replies, her arms circling around Lucy's waist.

"Even if we did try to run away," Lucy smirks, "We would have probably ended up killing each other over something stupid. Like you not cleaning the dishes."

"Or you not taking out the trash."

"Or you making fun of my TV shows," Lucy whispers as she slowly rises to the tops of her toes.

"Or you trying to bake in my kitchen," Red leans down closer.

"You calling me a child."

"You calling me a chicken."

"You are a chicken," Lucy says, before finally placing her lips upon Red's; instantly the older woman pulls Lucy closer against her. In shock, Lucy's lips part- allowing Red's tongue entrance. Both moan in favor of their new interaction. Slowly they stumble their way to the chair, to which Red sits and Lucy on top of Red. The younger woman's right hand plays with Red's hair sticking out from under the cloth on the back of her neck, while her left hand itches its way to the top of the older woman's breasts. Red's hands roam lower on Lucy's back- slowly reaching her bottom, only to abruptly pull the younger woman closer.

Lucy pulls apart, leaving both women panting. Looking into Red's now indigo eyes, the younger woman is reminder of her original intent for coming.

"Red?" Lucy asks.

"Yes, moy angel," Red replies, her accent heavy with lust.

"What would you do for me?" Lucy lays a kiss on Red's neck.

"Any…anything."

"Leave the mafia, stop contact, stop importing things in here." Lucy says, placing her lips back on Red's.

* As usual I do not know what happened to this chapter… Kind of just word vomit. Anyways reviews are love. Really. If you like this story, review. It does not even have to be a good review- just a reminder for me to update. Even if you do not review, I will still update- I am not that mean. Off the topic of reviews…I've been writing one shots- some with Lucy/Red and others with Lucy's 'actress'/Kate- I'm thinking about posting some…what do you guys think?" *


	10. Chapter 10

* Disclaimer- does not own OIGGLO. For those people who do not read author's notes- can I get a hell no! I cooked too much alfredo and now I don't know what to do with it- who wants some? But seriously I made too much. Maybe Red and Lucy will want some… I actually do not know why I made it. I do not like alfredo. Funny story- I showed my friend this story and they have been texting me all day #Rucy. You guys should make it a thing…but wait no. No one reads the author's notes. #Noauthor'snotes #RUCY *

**Chapter 10**

**(never thought this would happen)**

"Hey," a familiar voice comes behind Lucy, stopping her eyes from darting to the next page of her book.

"Uh," She says looking up, her mouth splitting into a grin, "Hi, Poussey."

"The book you recommended," Poussey says walking towards the other woman leaning against the back book self, "It was great, but what the fuck? Did Gus really have to die?"

"See," Lucy closes the book in her hands, "That's the genius of John Green- makes you fall in love with a character and takes them away. To show that one's life doesn't have to impact the world, but it will impact someone's world."

"Still, not right," Poussey replies, crossing her arms in front of her, "I see you've been reading my recommendation."

"Yes! Dorian Gray was defiantly gay!"

"Well, if you want any more book recommendations," Poussey smirks and looks down at her hand, "Taystee has read some good ones… and if you aren't afraid to come to the 'ghetto' side, you could discuss some of them with us."

"That sounds great," Lucy replies, before waving off Poussey and returning to her book. It did sound great. Lucy decided to isolate herself from the suburb clique after Red refused her request. Sure, Morello, Nicky, and Yoga Jones did not deserve it, but being with them meant being around Red. Lucy should have stuck to her original plan- avoidance.

Big Boo had finally come up to her earlier today. She apologized. Did not know she 'belonged to Red'. That, right away, decided Lucy's decision for her.

Lucy looks up at the clock in the corner of the library and sighs. It is not time for work to end, but it is time for Lucy to leave. Miss Rosa is getting worse. Or at least that is what they told her. Now she has to move her stuff to a new cube, while Miss Rosa is taken somewhere else. Miss Rosa has been her one true friend since the first day Lucy came, and now the woman is being taken away from her. Lucy knows Miss Rosa would not willingly leave Lucy. Their bond had become a mother-daughter one, a strong one, one that is not easily given up.

There is already a box on her bed waiting for her. She puts in her books- borrowed and owned. As well as her kakis. Slowly, she looks over to Miss Rosa's side. Just about everything was gone. On the bed, however, folded up is a purple and green blanket Lucy had helped Miss Rosa's knit. Lucy picks it up and brings it to her chest.

The work alarm goes off.

Lucy picks up her box and blanket, and makes her way to the fourth cube on the right side. Over her neighbor's bed is a pentagram and Lucy groans. She hopes her new neighbor is someone like the Nun- religious but not frighteningly so. Quickly, she unpacks her things, hoping to get in and out of Suburbs as soon as possible. Most women visit their cube before lunch.

Just as she lays out her blanket, she hears a low feminine voice, "You McCoy?"

Lucy turns around to see a woman maybe five years or so older than her with a tattoo sleeve on her right arm, a piercing in her lip, and her hair cut similar to Big Boos but green.

"Yeah, I'm Lucy."

"Like Lucifer?" the woman questions, her arms crossing in front of her chest.

"Uh, no?"

"That was a joke," however opposed to her own words, the woman does not smile, "I'm Stevens."

"Well…" Lucy puts on one of her larger sweatshirts, before making her way to the opening of the cube, "I'm just going to go to lunch now."

Stevens nods Lucy a goodbye, before Lucy heads off to the cafeteria. Unfortunately, the line had gotten long. Great, she thinks to herself, just great. She waits, of course like a normal person; however, she keeps her head down, not wanting any of the women to see her. Her plan does not work out.

"The food sucks and I blame you," Trisha, one of Red's 'girls', says.

"The food always sucks."

"No," Trisha replies, her left hand turns into a fist and hits her right palm, "It is usually alright. Today, however, it sucks."

"I'm sorry," Lucy replies, taking a step forward in line, "But, tell me, why is it my fault."

"My girl Mercy said Red didn't cook today," Trisha hits her hands together one more time, "Said something about her not feeling like it today. You know what I'm feeling, McCoy?"

"I don't know. Regret, for that awful neck tattoo?"

"No," Trisha takes a step closer to Lucy, "I saw you go into Red's office yesterday. I am not as stupid as girly girls like you think. I also know a manipulative bitch when I see one. I'm feelin' that you did something and now Red is becoming weak."

"I would call it lazy," Lucy keeps her eyes in contact with Trisha, trying not to show how 'out of her comfort zone' she feels right now, "and you don't know anything. There is nothing between your mother hen and me."

"You can say whatever you want," Trisha finally takes a step back, "But I know what I saw and I know there is something mentally wrong in that head of yours."

When Trisha leaves, Lucy is finally able to breathe again. She takes another step in line, finally up in front. Trying to shake off Trisha's words, she takes a tray and makes her way to an empty table in the back.

Cautiously she dips her fork in what looks like some sort of casserole and takes a bite, only to, instantly spit it back out in a napkin. The food was truly awful today. And awful was being generous.

"Lucy?" the young woman looks up to see Yoga Jones, "Why you sitting over here?"

"I…" Lucy does not know what to say. I do not want to sit with you. No, it is not because of you. It is because of Red. Yes, I know how childish that sounds. It is what is best, though. I promise.

"Can I join you?" Yoga Jones asks, cutting off Lucy's unintended pause.

No. "Sure."

And so she sits, as well as Morello, Nicky and the others. There went Lucy's plan. She would have to work on a long term one, Lucy decides. One, where she will have to, slowly break it off.

"Are you alright, Luce?" Morello asks concern evident on her face.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine," Maybe there is something wrong with her. Maybe Trisha is right. Trisha is not stupid and there could be something mentally wrong with Lucy.

"Okay, good," Morello smiles and leans against Nicky's shoulder, "You've been awfully quiet. We just got you back from the kitchen- we don't want you to alienate us now."

Later that night, Lucy lies in bed, holding Miss Rosa's blanket like a teddy bear to her side, when she hears a moan to her left. She does not think anything of it, until it happens for a second and third time. Hesitantly she turns her head to her new cubemate and gags. Of course.

Lucy does not care if it is 'bed time' or 'against the rules,' she stands up and walks to Morello and Nicky's cube. While Morello is passed out, Nicky looks up to her in confusion.

"I can't do this," Lucy whispers, as she sits upon Nicky's bed, at the other woman's feet, "I cannot do this anymore."

"What?"

"This prison," Lucy leans her head against the wall, "its making me insane, literally insane."

"What happened?" Nicky questions as she sits up, and leans against the wall beside Lucy.

"My rollercoaster relationships with everyone, being blamed for the food today, losing Miss Rosa," Lucy replies, bringing up her knees and placing her hand and chin upon them, "and now my roommate is masturbating."

"Ya got Stevens?" Nicky quietly chuckles, "that sucks. You are going to be getting that show every night. Good luck with never sleeping again."

"Tell me you are joking?"

"I wish I was," Nicky chuckles once more before her face falls, "you are to be blamed for the food though. I did warn you."

"And somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew you were right," Lucy replies, " does this prison offer therapy?"

"Nah," she replies, "the best we have is Healy and that's not saying much."

"So, if there is something wrong with us, we are expected to suffer," Lucy questions and raises her right eyebrow, "what about those who are depressed?"

"Put on pills."

"OCD."

"Pills."

"Bipolar."

"Poppin' pills."

"But what if you don't know what wrong with you?"

"Do you think there is something wrong with you, pix?" Nicky lays a hand on Lucy's head and brushes down the curls.

"I think so," Lucy replies, "It's like sometimes, I'm not myself. Like I know something is wrong, but then there is as if a switch flipped and I decide to do it anyways. Most of the time, there is nothing but cookies and kittens and books in my head, but then I get these thoughts. These manipulative thoughts. I try to rebel against it. Really I do. I am afraid though, someone will say something and the switch will flip. I'll hurt them- not physically, but emotionally."

"Does Red know?"

"Yeah," Lucy replies softly, "the switch always seems to always flip when I am around her. I think she caught on at some point when I use to work for her. Never said anything though. It flipped yesterday. After dinner. I cannot believe what I did. I used what you said against her. She did not do what I asked, thank God. I cannot be around her, Nicky. I do not want to be this person."

"Alright, pix," Nicky says, still calmly stroking Lucy's hair, "I'm here for you. I'll help."


	11. Chapter 11

* Don't own OITNB. However, I do own this story…really. Do not steal. I will cut you. Nevertheless, if you do want to check out other stuff that involves this universe, check out my one-shots. And don't forget #RUCY*

**Chapter 11**

"That color does nothing for your complexion, dear," Lucy's mom taps a perfectly polished nail upon her red coated lips, "I should talk to someone."

"Don't be ridiculous, Marian," Lucy's stepfather, Bob, places his arm around his wife, a smile etched under his thick mustache. Once, when life was different, he had been Lucy's chorus teacher. He dresses like a stereotypical high school teacher; ugly multicolored sweater with a brown blazer on top. Even acted like one. Any day now, Lucy expected to get a letter in the mail saying how he had taken in a group of poor street kids- teaching them to sing and the meaning of life.

"You look paler," Marian goes on, "Are they feeding you? Getting enough sleep?"

"Marian, she is fine."

_"Lucy," Timmy pushes her into her room, "Jasper has been gone for a week. I am tired of your mopping. You are going to get dressed. Jessica and I are going to wait downstairs. And we are going out. Am I clear, maggot?"_

_ "Sir, yes, sir," Lucy giggles and closes her large white door behind her. She walks over to her walk in closet and frowns. Her mother was very disappointed in Lucy's lack of interest when it came to shopping; therefore, she had placed the task in her own hands and bought what she sought fit for her only daughter. It consisted mainly of dresses. Lots and lots of dresses. _

_ Her small fingers trail along the cloth as she makes it closer to the back, to the purple one. Out of the clothes she picked out, she only owned three dresses: a purple, a blue, and a red one. The purple one had a scoop neck and a-lined from just above the hips, stopping at the thighs. No design. Just purple. Lucy also picks out a black pushup bra and matching underwear. _

_ Her friends found it funny that her mother went out more than she did once Jasper had been forced to leave. Nevertheless, truth was, she felt as if half of her soul had been taken with him. Her mother's expectations of her raised even more, now that the man she was going to marry went off to a good college to get a medical degree. She expected the same of Lucy. Good college, marriage, than grand kids. Who cares if you know how to cook, do laundry, any basic living skill, as long as you go to a good college, get married, and have children. _

_ Since her father left them, it had been the one advice her mother would give her, which quickly turned into a forced life plan. _

_ "You don't want to end up like me, Lu?" she would say, bottle always seeming to appear in hand "Living off your parent's money. Marrying some guy who didn't care about you, but can through a football half a field. Love, it is an idea, Lu. Making things work…now that, that is how relationships survive."_

_ Lucy finishes curling the ends of her hair and then pulls on her 'slut heels,' a pair of black pumps, which still made her shorter than everyone else is. Quickly, she makes her way down the stairs to the living room._

_ "Draw me like one of your French girls," Jimmy says, sprawled along her mother's white plastic covered couch, causing both Jessica and her to laugh at his cliché joke. _

_ "Are you ready to leave, Rose?" Lucy asks, reaching her hands out towards him. He takes them with a smile and stands up. Together they walk to Jimmy's car and leave for the party. Once a month, the worst teacher of Yolbreak High School goes out of town. So, once a month, his only son has a party. Everyone goes, because who wouldn't want to fuck up the most hated man in the town's house._

_ The lawn is already filled with cars, as well as most of the street. They end up parking a few houses down and hike up the hill in their fancy clothes, to the party. The door, once more is already beaten in, soon to fall off the hinges. The smell of alcohol and smoke swerves through the sweaty young crowds and into everyone's noses._

_ "This is going to be fun," Jessica's sarcasm does not seem to register with Jimmy as he excitedly agrees with her. The whole house seems to vibrate with the beat of the random dubstepped music. Slowly, they push their way to the kitchen to grab drinks. As Lucy reaches for a beer, a large hand places itself on her shoulder, and turns her around._

_ "There's my baby doll," his words were yet to be slurred, but his body still wobbled. His black hair was fluffed more than usual, a problem that occurred when he runs his hands through his hair too much. His tan seemed to be darker than usual, despite the almost winter season. He wore a button down white shirt, sleeves rolled up, dark green pants, and converse._

_ "Hello, Eric," Lucy address her secret ex boyfriend, with a frown._

_ "You look beautiful," he says leaning in closer to her, "I always like it when you wear dresses. Much more attractive than a hoodie."_

_ "That's nice," Lucy says, taking a swig of her warming drink._

_ He takes her dainty hand in his, "Come, dance with me."_

_ "I don't," she says, trying to take her hand away, "I don't think so."_

_ "Come on, Jasper isn't here."_

_ "That doesn't matter," Lucy pulls her hand once more, this time succeeding, "It would be wrong. I…"_

_ "It's just a dance."_

_ It isn't until she has a few more drinks in her, does she finally agree to dance. But it wasn't just a dance. He takes her upstairs, promising to show her something. They make their way into a empty bed room. _

_ "I promise," He says, "this will be fun."_

_ "What are you doing, Eric?" she slurs, as he pushes her onto the bed, "What were you going to show me?"_

_ He lays her down and it finally hits her. She pushes up against him. However, a fairy is not strong enough to push a giant away. Eric reaches down to the bottom of her short dress and pulls it up to her stomach._

_ "Eric, stop, please," She begs, trying to push the larger man away. However, he pulls the rest of the dress over her head and places rough kisses across her chest._

_ "Really, beautiful," he whispers, taking her wrists into his left hand and holding them above her head. She tries to kick him, but he pins her down with his legs. Fear fills her eyes as she screams, but is soon cut short, when he covers her mouth with is greedy lips, forcing his tongue in, making her gag._

_ With his right hand, he undoes his pants and pulls out his member. Mascara filled tears begin to fall from Lucy's face. He pushes himself in. She tries to scream, but he covers her mouth with his meaty hand. _

_ She should not have drank that much. She should have stayed with Jimmy and his boyfriend or Jessica and the other dancers. She should have never gone out. She should have left with Jasper, when he asked. There were lots of things, that she should have done, but none of them would have stopped this moment from happening._

_ Eric zips up his pants and leaves. Lucy quickly pulls back on her dress and leaves. She runs down the stairs and to Jimmy, who is outside. He sees her makeup stained face and they quickly find Jessica, before leaving. _

_ Lucy does not say a word in the car. Jimmy does not stop apologizing however. He wants nothing more to help her, but he does not know how. _

_ Jimmy drops her off at her mother's house. Her mom is backing home. Lucy slowly makes her way inside. She closes the large wooden door behind her and takes off her heels._

_ "Where were you?" Her mother says, still dressed in her date attire, her arms crossed in front of her chest, anger in her eyes. Lucy doesn't answer._

_ "I said, where were you?" the older woman questions again, yet does not receive a reply, so she walks over to her daughter._

_ "Lucy Elaina McCoy, you answer me, when I am speaking to you," her mother's hand comes down, slapping her across the face, "you were not supposed to leave this house."_

_ "I'm sorry," Lucy says, looking down towards the floor._

Lucy looks down towards the table. No, she is not fine. Yes, she probably has gotten paler. Yes, they were feeding her. Yes, she needed more sleep.

"Jasper is sorry her couldn't make it," Marian says, leaning towards her new husband, "He had a doctor's appointment; a doctor having to go to a doctor- it's ironic."

"It is, isn't it, honey?" Bob say with a smirk.

"You know, Lucy," the older woman continues, now leaning towards the table, taping her nails against the metal, "I'm sure you could still get into NYU, once you get out of here, of course. Get back on track to our goal. Everyone goes though a bump in life. This is your bump. I bet Jasper's mom will even let you teach a few dance classes for money. It is something you know how to do. Maybe even get back into dance. How does that sound?"

"Great," Lucy grits through her teeth.

"All right," A CO calls from behind them, and Lucy sighs in relief, "Time's up."

Lucy gets up quickly and leaves the visitors room, a frown on her face. She makes her way to the Suburbs and sits on Morello's bed. Both Nicky and Morello look at her in pity.

"I hate her," Lucy says, bringing her legs to her chest, "I literally hate her."

Nicky only laughs, knowing what it is like to not have the mother of the year. Morello places a hand on Lucy's shoulder, "It's alright, Lucy. You got it over. Just like a band aid."

"Good news," Nicky says, causing Lucy to lift her head to her puffy haired friend, "tonight's taco night…really this time."

The girls talk about food- the food here, the food they miss… Abruptly Morello stands up, "Oh my, I just realized, I have to drive Miss Rosa to the hospital… I'll see you guys later."

Once she is gone, Nicky makes her way over to Lucy and sits beside her, "So, I was thinking about your problem."

"Oh?" Lucy says, sitting up a little straighter.

"More than thinking actually," Nicky says, " I actually went to the library. I was looking up some disorders…and I was thinking bipolar, but I don't think that's right. So then I was like, maybe she has a multiple personality. But that wasn't it either."

"So?" Lucy questions, "Already going straight for the crazy disorders."

"Well," Nicky says, with a smile, "You're not exactly sane."

"True."

"Then I found it," Nicky says, picking back where she left off, "You said something about manipulation… well I think you could have Histrionic personality disorder."

"A what?"

"Yeah, it says it usually begins early adult-hood, which is around where you are now. It causes you to flip a switch when you want appreciation- makes you a manipulative bitch to achieve your own needs. So, I was thinking, you could make an appointment to see the doctor and bring up this disorder…maybe there is a test you could take."

"Thank you, Nicky," Lucy says, her arms wrapping around her friend- truly happy that this woman cared enough about her….that Nicky just cared about her in general.

"And maybe you should talk to Red," Nicky says as the pull apart, "About this…"

"I don't know, Nicky."

"If you to really care about each other… I mean from what you've told me, she obviously has an idea something is wrong with you."

"You're right," Lucy says, nodding her head.


	12. Chapter 12

*Disclaimer- Don't own OITNB, but yeah, do own this one. Including the OCs.*

**Chapter 12**

"I know you, I've walked with you once upon a dream," Poussey sings to Lucy, taking her hand and twirling the younger woman into her chest.

"I know you, the gleam in your eyes is so familiar a gleam," Lucy replies, twirling away from Poussey, their hands still entwined, with their other arm sticks out to the side in a dramatic pose.

They turn towards each other now, as Poussey continues "And I know it's true, that visions are seldom as they seem."

"But if I know you," Lucy continues taking a step closer to Poussey, " I know what you'll do- you'll love me at once, the way you did once, upon a dream…"

"You two are a mess," Nicky says from the table, across from their scene, her arms crossing in front of her chest, a false frown on her face.

"You know you love it," Lucy replies, as she skips over to Nicky, sitting upon her lap, a smile spreading on her face, "And you're just jealous, because you can't sing."

"You're right," Nicky's arms slide around Lucy, "I'm filled with envy. I don't know how I have survived this long, without having an inch of talent that you posses, I…"

"Alright, Nicky," Lucy places her hand upon Nicky's mouth, "I get it."

Poussey joins them at the table, sitting across from the two friends.

Lucy had gone to the doctors yesterday. It official. Lucy had a problem, but no medication could fix it. Now, instead of going to Red, she is openly ignoring the problem and annoying Nicky. When she is better, Lucy told her puffy haired friend, she will tell Red. Until then however, she is going to get back into what she had enjoyed before her life exploded. Singing was one of them. Poussey even agreed to audition for the Christmas show with her. Unfortunately, her German-speaking friend agrees that putting off he problem is not going to fix it.

"Alright, we've fixed your flat, Luce," Poussey says, placing her hands on the table, drumming upon it with her thumbs, "Now, you have to go talk to Russia."

"I'll… Can't I do it tomorrow?"

"No," Nicky answers, "We agreed on today. All you have to do is talk, nothing else. You don't even have to tell her about your visit to the doctor…just talk about the weather, the Christmas show, something…"

"But," Lucy says, before Nicky pushed the younger woman off her lap, "Fine."

Lucy walks out of the rec room and strolls slowly down the hallway, her hands behind her back. She hums another Disney song, ignoring the awkward looks she gets from the other women. Eventually she makes her way to the vacant cafeteria, besides the kitchen, where the women are working on dinner. Her humming ceases as she walks in the back. The kitchen workers don't look at her, for they are use to her random appearances now. Except for one.

A new woman, Anya, had joined the staff two days ago. She is short and large eyed like Lucy, but she has straight long blonde hair, in comparison to Lucy's short brown curls. Her lips were larger, giving her the baby doll look, but there was something off about her that Lucy did not like.

Red is at the back of the counter, rolling out dough, with Anya close by. Suddenly, Lucy gets the urge to turn around. She shouldn't have listened to Nicky. She takes a step back prepared to leave, until Red looks up and her blue eyes meet hers. Red instantly smiles and Lucy feels better. She walks over to the older woman, hands back behind her back. Red puts the pin down and wipes her hands against the apron wrapped around her waist, "Hello Lucy."

"Red," Lucy smiles, "can we talk?"

"Of course, moy angel," she says, before turning towards Anya, "Do you mind finishing this?"

"Anything for you," Anya says, a slight Russian accent making itself suddenly visible. Lucy ignores this, and follows Red to her office. Red sits in her chair, as Lucy sits upon her desk.

"So panda bears and cheese cake," Lucy states, bringing her legs up onto the desk, sitting Indian style, "I take it Nicky warned you I would show up today."

"Yesterday," Red replies, "and I thought you preferred sugar cookies over cheese cake."

"Eh. What did she tell you?"

"Nothing much," Red bring the chair closer her desk and places her right elbow besides Lucy's legs, and her head upon her hand, "I want you to tell me."

"You already know," Lucy's legs come undone and dangles from the edge, "Don't you?"

"That does not matter, Lucy," She says, " I want to hear it from you. I also want to know what happened. And not just what got you in here, but what happened before we met. You have these secrets, you're afraid to tell. But if you will let me in, I want to help you, moy angel."

"That's the thing, though," Lucy looks up at the ceiling, "I am worried, once you find out, you won't look at me the same. I won't be your angel any more."

"Lucy," Red says calmly, her accent hitting harder than before, causing Lucy to look down, "Nothing you say will change how I feel about you. You are always going to be my angel."

"I have a mental disorder," Lucy looks down at her hands now, twiddling her thumbs around each other, "It's called Histrionic- it causes me to have unstable emotions, and make rash decisions, and gullible, and seek constant approval, and weak… Red, it makes me weak."

"No," She says, reaching out for Lucy's hand, "You are not weak. If anything this makes you stronger. You know now what is wrong. You know the signs and you have accepted it. You are moving on from it, not letting it take over your life. What do the doctors think is the cause?"

"Well, we believed it started before I began working for you…"

"Of course."

"I…" Lucy tries again, "You know how my mom is."

"Yes," Red grits through her teeth, her hate for the other woman obvious.

"Well she… it was worse than I originally told you."

"Did she hurt you?"

Lucy takes a deep breath, before answering, "Yes, it started when I was seventeen. I had come home from a party…"

Lucy stops then, a tear finally falling from her eyes. It is harder to tell Red her past, than she had believed. She is so afraid of Red pitying her and looking at her like a fragile china doll, then as who she is now.

"Lu, you do no 'ave to tell me everything now," Red says, breaking the silence, rubbing circles with her thumb upon Lucy's hand.

"But I do," the younger woman says, "I have put it off long enough. You deserve to know, once and for all. Red, I was raped at that party, by one of my ex boyfriends. And…and when I came home, my mother was drunk as usual and had forgotten she had told me I could go out. That was the first time she slapped me. I never got a chance to speak. And it didn't stop after that night. So when I turned eighteen, I finally had the courage to leave. I applied for the job at your café and tried to put the past behind me."

"Lucy…" Red says, standing up.

_"__Lucy," Vlad says, handing her a small black box, "for you."_

_She opens it to see fifty or so bullet, "So instead of, I don't know, money, this is how you pay me?"_

_Vlad looks up from the wooden table in the back of the café, "No, your job isn't done doll face. This is to help you finish it."_

_ "__You are joking, right?" Lucy questions, her arms coming across her chest, "You said all I had to do was play bait, for the Irish. I did that. It is over."_

_ "__No, that was to see how far you are willing to go to help," He replies standing up, walking closer to her, "How well we can trust you. You're real work starts now. The gun, is for your protection, doll."_

_ "__So what am I suppose to do?" She replies, trying to keep her face from falling into a frown._

_ "__You are going to persuade the Carnegie's son to talk with Dmitri," he says, now directly in front of her, a smile on his face._

_ "__And how am I suppose to do that?"_

_He leans in closer to Lucy, wrapping his right arm around her back, pulling her closer, "Flaunt your girlish body, flirt, get him into bed if you have to…"_

_ "__No," Lucy removes his arm from around her, "I am not going to sleep with that scott's son, just for you to gain information about their trade. I refuse."_

_ "__I don't think you have a choice, Lucy," Vlad turns around from her and begins to walk away, but stops just at the door, "You are in to deep now, American Doll. If you don't do this, we will have no choice but to kill you."_

_With that he leaves her. Frustration fills Lucy, quickly turning into anger. She walks out of the back and into the shop area, her right hand turning into a fist, while the other squeezes the black box._

_ "__Lucy?" she hears a familiar Russian voice, causing her to look up. Galina is at the counter with powder on her cheek and a pin in hand. The anger turns to guilt. _

_ "__Hello," Lucy replies faking a smile as she walks over to the Russian woman, "What are you making?"_

_ "__Sugar cookies," Galina replies, returning to the dough in front of her, "go wash your hands and help me."_

_Lucy does as she is told, as well as pick out some cookie cutter from one of the drawers- a heart, butterfly, and a dinosaur._

_ "__Really, moy angel?" Galina questions, a smirk appearing in the corner of her mouth, "a dinosaur?"_

_ "__Yes!"_

"Lucy," Red says again, causing the younger woman to look up, "I am so sorry."

"Why?" Lucy voice cracks at the end of the word, "You did not do anything."

Red places her thumbs under Lucy's eyes and wipes away the tears, "I am sorry for what you went through. I am sorry; I wasn't there to protect you. I am sorry; for everything that happened after you left your mother. I am sorry for how I've been to you. Lucy, I am sorry for everything."

"Red, please don't…" Lucy's green eyes have become dark from the tears; "Please don't feel pity for me. Please don't treat me differently…please…"

"Of course not," Red replies, leaning closer, placing her forehead against Lucy's, "Just, no more hiding from me, love. Let me help you…protect you."

"Okay," Lucy says, a smile finally breaking through, "I like you."

The Russian woman chuckles before replying, "I like you too, Lucy."


	13. Chapter 13

* Disclaimer- don't own OITNB*

*Author's Note- Sorry. School. 'Nough said.

Chapter 13

"Jasper," Lucy's eyes watch him as he attempts to make himself comfortable in the chair in front of her, "You cut off all your hair?"

"Shaved, actually," he replies, pulling the beanie farther down on his head, "It's bad, isn't it?"

"No," she smiles, causing a blush to bleed through his cheeks, "Just different. It's back though, isn't it?"

"I…uh," Jasper looks down at his hands, knowing he has little time with her; however there is no way to hide it anymore, "Yeah, the cancer is back."

"Alright, time is up," a female CO calls. Immediately, Lucy stands up and pulls Jasper to her. She did not want him to go. She did not want him to be going through this once more, without her. She wanted to be with him. And for the first time, she can't do anything about it.

"Lucy-love," he says pulling back, a frown etched on his face, "I have to go."

"When will you be back?"

"As soon as possible," he pulls her hands to his lips, "I promise."

Lucy walks back to the rec room, her heart beating wildly, willing tears to swell into her eyes; however, she refuses to let them fall. She see Gina at a table alone, knitting, and quickly joins her. The sit together in a comfortable silence- Gina in the zone, while Lucy watches whatever Animal Planet show is on, on the TV in the corner- until Morello shows up, magazine in hand. She sits with a happy sigh and opens up, what Lucy now sees, as a bridal magazine.

"What do you think?" Morello questions as she shows Lucy a lace gown, with a 50s feeling.

"It's nice," Lucy's eyebrows come down in confusion, "But, why are you looking at gowns?"

"Oh!" Her face breaking into a large grin, "my fiancé, Christopher, sent me a letter. We decided to move the wedding date closer- so I want to be ready, once I get out of here."

"Well," Lucy bite at one of her nails, that she did not realize had made to near her mouth, "congratulations."

"Oh, thanks sweetie," Morello replies as she flips to the next page, revealing a sparkly a-line dress, her grin turning into a toothy smile, "what about this one?"

"No," Nicky says, sitting joining the table, causing Gina to get up and move to an isolated one, "It is awful. They are all awful."

"Whatever, Nicky," Morello's smile turns upside down.

"May I?" Lucy questions as she gestures to the magazine.

Morello gives one more look at Nicky, before nodding, "sure, hun."

Lucy takes the magazine from Morello and begins to flips through the pages, admiring the interact designs and detail that when into each dress. She stops on a page near the end. It looked like her dress.

_"Jasper, you're insane," Lucy throws her head back in laughter, stopping her movement on the swing._

_ "Come on," he says, a sudden tone of seriousness appearing in his voice, "Why not? I mean, we do not have to tell anyone. Though, I don't doubt your mom wouldn't be thrilled… marrying a doctor."_

_ "You've been in town for a day…" Lucy starts only to be interrupted._

_ "But I have known you forever."_

_ "I'm too young…"_

_ "It can be a long engagement."_

_ "You're leaving soon."_

_ He gets off his swing and kneels in front, "Come with me."_

_ "Jasper."_

_ "Lucy."_

_ She takes a deep breath in, before taking his head into her small dainty hands, "I have to think about it. I need time."_

_ Jasper sighs, before standing up and picking Lucy up off the swing, and holding her in his arms like a man caring his bride over the threshold, "I wish, I could give you all the time in the world, Lucy-love, but I need your answer soon."_

_ "I know," she says, wrapping her arms around his neck, brining his lips to hers. It was just going to be a quick peck, but she brings his lips back to hers, again, and again, and again. Her mouth opens and a moan escapes, as Jasper moves his hand from under her legs. In response, she brings her legs around his waist. With another moan, he pushes her up against one of the swing set poles._

_ "Hotel," Lucy gasps, pulling apart from him._

It was a loose off the shoulder white dress, with a trail of lace in the back leading into a train. The dress is not exactly like the one she had picked out before she ended up in this hellhole, but it is definitely similar. She never said yes, though. It was out of bored, she was looking at dresses one day, and she found the one. The one she would wear if she had ever said yes. However, an engagement never came out that night, a pregnancy did.

Lucy closes the magazine quickly and hands it back to Morello.

"Are you alright, pix?" Nicky asks, worry lines appearing on her forehead.

"Great, she replies, just as the alarm for dinner goes off. It is taco night- that usually makes everyone happy. Not Lucy. She could not get Jasper out of her mind. Should she have said yes? If she did, she would not be here, but probably somewhere in Virginia, with him. Taking care of him. Watching terrible movies. Maybe still pregnant. Preparing for the wedding…or maybe already married. Would she be happy?

Lucy turns her head to the kitchen. Would she be happy?

Red and Lucy were finally on normal terms, finally accepting of their feelings. She brings her right hand to her mouth- she knew the bad habit is coming back, but she did not care. Lucy cared…cares for Red, really she does. But Jasper… Jasper had always been the one. Even if she did not want to see it, he is.

Is it possible to be in love with two people at the same time?

Lucy bites her thumbnail.

Red comes out of the kitchen, a smile on her face, talking to Gina and Anya.

Yes, it is.

Anya touches Red on her arm, a grin on her face. Red smiles at Anya. Lucy feels something in the pit of her stomach. A feeling she did not like. Suddenly, Red laughs at some so fucking funny, that Anya says. Lucy ignores the need to stand up and force herself in the little space in between the two women.

Abruptly, Lucy stands up, takes her tray of untouched food, and throws it away, before making it back to the table, ready for dinner to end. And slowly, it does.

The women make their way to the rec room once more- for tonight, is movie night. Lucy stops at the suburbs first, to grab her blanket, done my Ms. Rosa. When she gets to the room, she sees that most chairs have already been taken. She takes a chair in the back with a frown.

She feels someone sit next to her, in the once vacant chair. Gradually, she turns her head to see Red. Lucy takes the older woman's left arm, and holds it against herself like a stuffed animal, before leaning her head against Red's shoulder.

"Why didn't you eat?" Red whispers down towards her.

"You saw that?"

"Of course," she replies, her accent softer than usual.

"I guess, I lost my appetite."

"Don't let if become a habit, moy angel," Red offers some blue chips with her free hand, just before the movie starts. Princess Bride. It is Jasper's favorite. Is it wrong to think about him now? As she holds on to Red?

"Thank you," Lucy takes another chip, after reaching her head up to place a kiss on Red's cheek.


End file.
